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13- A Different View of PTSD and Stress

The Cure / Aimee Cabo
The Cross Radio
February 11, 2019 6:22 pm

13- A Different View of PTSD and Stress

The Cure / Aimee Cabo

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February 11, 2019 6:22 pm

On today’s show Aimee and Dr Nikolov speak with Brett Cotter, author and founder of Stress Is Gone, LLC an organization focused on self-care solution to reduce the effects of stress-related illnesses.

THE CURE Live streamed podcast is hosted by Aimee Cabo and offers a platform of hope to anyone who has experienced domestic violence, abuse, mental illness, any trauma or is experiencing problems now in their lives. It's a place to find comfort, knowledge, strategies, answers, hope and love while healing the wounds and 'affirming' that you are not alone.  

Join Aimee and her professional guests on  The Cure with Aimee Cabo podcast    every Saturday at 1 PM EST  as it is recorded during the live radio show.

You can find information about the show and past guests by visiting the  RADIO SHOW PAGE.

You can also view the weekly  Video podcasts  on Apple Podcasts.  

Aimee hopes that anyone who has suffered abuse of any kind, or walked a moment in similar shoes, will find inspiration in these pages, and hope that love and truth will ultimately prevail. Please subscribe and share this podcast.
 
HOSTS:

Aimee Cabo Nikolov is a Cuban American who has lived most of her life in Miami. After many years of healing, finding love, raising a family and evolving her relationship with God, Aimee's true grit and courage led her to pen an honest, thought-provoking memoir. Years of abuse became overshadowed with years of happiness and unconditional love. Now Aimee is the president of IMIC Research, a medical research company, a speaker, radio host and focused on helping others. You can read more about Aimee by  visiting her website.
 
Dr. Boris Nikolov is the CEO of Neuroscience Clinic. You can read more about Dr. Nikolov and the work he is doing by  visiting his website.

GUESTS:

Brett facilitates Stress Is Gone Classes in corporations, schools, hospitals, and nonprofit organizations. He is a member of the American Academy of Experts in Traumatic Stress, Stress Coaching Association, PSI CHI International Honor Society in Psychology, and has a Bachelors in Psychology. He has received training from the Himalayan Institute and a Shaolin Grand Master. His approach is a blend of Eastern and Western philosophies. You can learn more about Brett's book 3 Keys to Managing PTSD: The Warrior's Guide to Overcoming Combat Trauma.

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Brought to you by volume ICU research life can bring many difficult situations, domestic violence, addictions, poverty and even sexual by your loved ones welcome, Amy, and the Q today and sell any exciting entities that we have a very special name Frank Cotter. He's a founder strength is gone. There are three keys to managing PTSD hello Pat a ref SI hey you great brat.

Understand that you're a specialist in managing stress discovered accurately to manage PTSD to tell me a little bit about what brought this how you found the need to go into business to pursue this endeavor of helping people show at the very beginning I needed help. I was 27. I had reached a lot of my goals that I set myself in life financially in a good relationship in a nice house job that I like, but I felt like I was at the top of the mountain and I wasn't satisfied. I felt like it would feel like there was a lot more and I still had a problem which we had been appointing me as I was 15 which was jealousy.

Jealousy was a very big problem that I have got stem from my own childhood trauma that has affected my relationships from page 15 to 27 and then a 27 when I got into various holistic healing method. I released a lot of my jealousy, my anger so I could start to become a more healthy relationships.

So it was my own jealousy that prompted me to get help to introspect deeper to help unleash and unlock the energy of anger, jealousy, the neediness that was in my heart from early in my childhood so that was how I got into it and I got lucky enough to come across a number of great teachers that help me release this energy and break the patterns so that I could one day be in a healthy relationship without that energy, jealousy, anger, and without that level of reactivity that would eat up my relationships is a lot to deal with retail scene discount, the scenes, I can't stick here and now I find out jealousy in a healthy way. As you can see I did get the many different things made many different errors so that more people can relate anyhow.

So tell me how long have you been studying this waste to to deal with stress and PTSD because a lot of us are already suffering from this year so I think the next 10+ years will start to see as a society, maybe worldwide that PTSD is far more reaching than we know now to me PTSD is our brain's way of venting stored all the motor and if it doesn't have an it because it is believed in the organs and about so the brain will identify outlets so for example for combat veteran and outlet might be hearing a car backfire or loud noise or could be in traffic dealing with authority figures could be anything. A relationship with a family member but those triggers are outlets for the buildup of emotions and tension and if we didn't have those triggers the body would just constrict intention to me. So PTSD is kinda like a teapot that boiling over right when it gets too hot and dark like that really spell it if we didn't have it. I feel stressed even be a bigger problem.

So I think we don't understand PTSD and what it does and what its purposes, but more importantly, I hope in the next five years that we really understand shows like your through programs like mine and is a few other techniques out there. I really believe in the program that I'm sharing with people gel people process the trauma so we identify a few key traumatic memories we can transform the emotional imprint on those memories and when that happens, the person is less reactive to those triggers in the environment because are actually processing the Trumbull from the inside out at the root cause stress and PTSD to meet someone sent somebody to place a game on their psyche that you just feel terrible about yourself because of your reactions the way that you react and because of that PTSD that you have people may have a hard time understanding what's going on there some symptoms that voices can share with us about how PTSD can have symptoms that are not so visible wanted to say that something that the mission also but in the beginning.before that because it is not necessarily related only to combat vets that has been dealt in deposits more and more related to a lot of other conditions and situations like abuse sort traumatic experience or domestic violence, even people can separate them from the 50 is the from numerous reasons and some of the symptoms can be you are getting angry as you set. You don't know why you getting angry, you can feel depressed and this is not really diagnose of depression but is related to the PTSD and the breadth so you actually are founder of something which skull stress is gone. Yes, it is exactly that you had like a group of helping people would be dizzy while stress is gone is my company I formed about 10 years ago. It was really my platform to share simple techniques that I know work and it was really born out of my private one-on-one coaching business which I had before. Stress is: so for years people would ask me know what what I do when I'm stressed out I would help will result trauma, but then it would say what I do when I'm repeatedly stressed out at work when I'm working at work work when I'm pulling up to the house right and what I did was come up with a technique over the last couple years, which really helps which is whenever someone feels stress they just touch the tension in her body and usually that's in your chest or your stomach while you're stressed and then you breathe deep and slow and once per breast you silently say I'm okay now. Those three steps used together at the same time activate the relaxation response usually within a minute. When that happens literally distressed melts away from the inside out your physiological change inside your body, and that helps people regain control and typically when we get stressed. It could happen could last for five minutes an hour.

Three. It could last for a while so that put people back in control of the simple mind-body technique that releases the tension and activates the rest of the super interesting I guess is so helpful to a lot of people as oats but so stress is gone. Was my platform to share tools like this and place right develop the mobile apps in the membership website and then we opened up a nonprofit side. Stress is gone which is really focused on the veterans and inner-city kids also like members of a people to be like members of stress is gone yet so veterans can go or active duty military families can go to stress is gone. Website go to the bottom left and they could immediately sign up for free membership have access to our online tools and the workbook and the e-book version and they could use all those tools are free corporations they sign up to be members and it's a per user monthly subscription cost interesting.

While this is interesting because a lot of people do live with stress even without passing through any troubles in the life you just like sometimes is very stressful. I say to everything from means eight to exercise whenever you hear from someone else to pray here. Anything can help to her from speaking to you. I think this 11 Vanity Fair everything. It's a combination of things. That's why we deal with common abuse and mental income in respect, conceptions that most importantly we emphasize in treatment concerning options and we invite Diaz because he don't know one thing can work for one person that it doesn't necessarily work for the other person to probe the best approaches multi-sited approach use right in front different things right that the more people that come together to help one another, the better they say that it takes a village to raise a child. Well, I think it takes a group of people to help those who are suffering.

That letter sounds that I can give you an example of one of the songs that really helped me and I find them every once in a while there, interesting songs I've never heard this is actually a video feast for guys playing the guitar in this little wooden church leaders.

Maybe two or three people clapping because it got on the mountain for 80 if you're listening to Amy L that okay Brett I hear you. Yes, yes I can hear you fine great. So yes I am very grateful for any techniques that anybody might have. I can see what you're talking about where you repeat to yourself I am okay okay okay because a division article very informative and I believe that if you tell some yourself something enough times this the same way you can tell yourself many times negative things and your self-esteem. Not on the mountain. I know in the will and in all will will will all and in his life can bring many difficult situations, domestic violence, addictions, poverty and even sexual abuse by your loved ones. The issue is not stay there, but to overcome all obstacles and show that with the love of God, your husband and your family. You can succeed. Love is the answer.

God is the keyword reveals from a very sincere and honest position.

Amy Carbo's life, a warrior who didn't give up and achieve the dream of her life. You can get to know more about her at her story on www.godistheq.com buying her book on Amazon.com and now we continue with Amy Carbo in the 218 80 cell here hosting have no legal thing that the lines would like to have Share their story life you have questions.

I number 30554123503055412350 today were joined by Boris and Brett Carter specializes in stressing PTFE rats a sorry about the that way back and talking about stress and how to deal with it and I was seen by there's different ways that I deal with stress and I realize that that might meet my most helpful way of helping myself because I've tried everything I've tried therapy. I've tried meditation appetite medication I've tried keeping I've tried escaping. I've tried everything and the only thing that really worked for me was praying this pain daily prayer doesn't necessarily change your circumstances.

You can just you are and how you deal with circumstances. And just like that, so that God can turn anything wrong and make it right and I am living I am living proof that a tragedy to contain interfere to light and to love story and incredible love story and that's why after I saw this therapeutic started to show the cure because I thought that if God was able to help me and I can share this message with others and he would help others and also wanted to shift to everyone that somebody can really go through a lot of things, incredible things, things that people when even believe and still make it okay to have God in their life that I welcome all kinds of ideas kinds any way that we can try help ourselves because the idea is that we say we don't get there.

Now I don't believe God wants us to decide if you want to be asked to be successful. Think of the songs that Katie stays have special meanings. Example chlorine and Mercedes seeing fluorine factors that affirmation I plan my escape from the loss that confine that's the idea move for an important show that you have grows to a beautiful effect for people as you share more more techniques and more more of your story and trauma such an important topic because it affects all of us at some level for me if we could talk about trauma little bit soon as you trauma occurs if we ever perceive a threat to our life that could be in some kind of form of abuse, emotional, mental and physical sexual or from C someone else or something else with a threat to their life. If a person that loves that's in animals and they see a cat get hit by a car.

That experience will be traumatic for them and environmentalist sees deforestation.

They could be traumatized by that because they are emotionally connected to that life form is not just trauma to us, that we could see someone else going through right in front of our eyes.

If there's a threat to life.

I feel that all life is connected so that we do have that response. You have that reaction with little that jarring reaction to the level to what the figures. The BD is the type of reaction like not everybody that sees anything called wood scuff. BD is even lower trauma. All I'm wet when when we draw the line went but as we actually deleted up response and what should you be more concerned that the check that response. You have to be aware of both. I feel because like let's say I'm a combat veteran, which I'm not. I five combat veterans. My family and let's say I was a combat veteran. I come home and my wife is really triggering right I have to be aware that she is my primary trigger and I have to be aware of my reactions and then through means of my own investigation or whatever tools that work for me like Amy was saying little different types of people out there all different types of techniques yet to find one that works for you. Okay so you have to find one that works for you and get to the source get to the trauma and process it.

This I feel is the key to human evolution, processing or trauma. Whether it was from being bullied in school were younger. Losing a loved one.

Whatever it is, but that trauma she is from packing authentic in the environment.

It causes reactions and overreactions from the stored emotions so you think about the word reaction it's re-acting the past that whole pattern for the initial pattern worked on getting the trauma sunken the same emotions and feelings of cinderblocks connections sometimes as well's absence is broken. You wonder why can't control yourself. This is something that I talk about in the book and I frame a lot of the conversation in terms of combat veterans. But again I feel the vast majority of people have this at some certain level is a curve right that some certain level that we all are affected by our past. Some levels of a muscle pointed works like you. It's what you can find that you feel confined by.

So if you look at the combat veteran example if they are trained very combat there experiencing life-and-death scenarios every day.

Their central nervous system becomes pride just like someone that's been in repeated sexual abuse, verbal abuse, your central nervous system becomes pride that may come home and there expected to be normal right after that use your expected to go to college or go to work in an office environment, you're expected to be totally like that ever happened and that's not that's ontological expectation so that a major, major step could be people around you to know about your condition and be more receptive to what is happening. That's a great point in the book or talk about having your team available and I have a page where they write down your team members with their phone numbers so that you have about seven people that are close to and I hope you got most of us do have a couple people in our lives that we can depend on and we could talk to him were feeling down. True friends are true family members to love one's at least three when you could have that connection when you're feeling that way you're not trapped anymore. You could reach out and talk to somebody for a lot of guys it could be meeting up with someone at the bar. Good friend and have a beer and you know just talking about what's going on there so the support groups. Yes there is a lot of work with total other way of leaving yourself into support is important to think, not in terms of that having your support network all around you. Having them at your availability to reach out and it's up to you to reach out as you're going through this certain point in life where you're not processing the trauma right and you're just living through it unconsciously and then you realize you're like an awakening and then you like him.

I got up all the stuff I've to work through and let go of and that's important. Time that you have loved ones in the connection to God's spiritual connection to the higher power because you are sometimes when no one might be around in that moment right sentiment is something yeah and some people call that the dark night of the soul. When you're all alone and you're going through some your worst pain and that's the time when you connect with the Holy Spirit and God in your greater the greater part of the party that knows all sees all and is all connecting click when Amy was saying what you're talking about prayer. I feel like she was connecting to the greater part of herself and getting the healing through.

That's what I was saying each actions become action you tell me that he thinks I have my daily work can be my best friend from English to me. If I allow myself to get angry thinking negative ways. I'm only hurting myself and that I can do good things. Things that make me part of myself.

Maybe helping somebody else to learn cleaning the house. Things get myself responsibilities daily and ask you do the right thing at the right way tend to care about yourself a little more you learn to love yourself and more importantly, give yourself a problem.

This is time to hear ourselves to blame ourselves so you don't forgive yourself once again yourself thinking improperly. Everything you said could be concrete with that important for giving yourself for me is like the first step in learning acceptance, for you are what you are and also what you are becoming. And then self-love. It really allow yourself to receive from the source of self-love Maccabee through experiencing music prayer interacting with people helping people. What I felt was when I was less conscious in my evolution of the person more of my behaviors were more patterns and reactions things like what I needed to do what I learned in grade school, high school, college, and then when I started meditating and letting go of some of my core core issues that had younger and getting a handle on and letting it go. I was able to live more inspired life to the things I really wanted to. That would make my heart sing and really a lot of fun bringing a lot more more fun, more love, more joy into our life.

We were not running and working within those patents. Why soft and successful day I clean the house and that work help my daughter with her homework helped me picking and effect elevate successful day.

I have even today… 5 o'clock in the morning that a nonworking process that can take time because Fannie Mae perk I paid a price.

I have nightmares I can't make it then thinking oh outpatient make it estimated to the chance that it's important not to knock yourself for the things he didn't do for your shortcomings that you know just brace yourself please yourself for the things that you're able to) the things that you have to have like an impossibly impossible goals and write. I remember when I was grateful.

I remember a time that was so dark.

I was grateful I was taking a shower. I think you got a small miracle and that's how difficult life can get.

Sometimes I mean it was time S the only thing that actually helped me but nightmares is very difficult for me Tuesday and that any suggestions for four nightmares. What can people do you have nightmares. A lot of folks have repetitive nightmares right and what I would like to do is look at the pattern of the emotion and see where that pattern is also showing up in your life but if it PTSD and after having a memory in the dream.

I'd like the same thing that your PTSD pattern is all about like. The experience dynamics within the dream correlated to the original trauma, then when you wake up your hand, one hand on your heart, one hand on your stomach start breathing deep and slow and embrace the visual of the flashback with your breath to your breathing deep and slow your inside the flashback.

Now closing your eyes are embracing the flashback with the breath, and you imagine that your breathing deep and slow in the body in the flashback, and you use the mantra. I'm okay once per breath seems sometimes it's just because of the seal team 60 so that it embracing the feeling with your breath and with the mantra in your nice and slow and easy because the breath and the touch delivers the mantra into the cells that are holding the trauma and the emotion and the memory that sounds good but I guess it sounds simple really believing complicated or impossible. Okay, what doing comes easy. Try to explain it again so if you woke up and you just don't feel right right you feel frightened or upset. And now what happened to me sometimes after my father died in the first six months after he passed away so what I would do is touch my heart that I was feeling really raw. There my heart and up to my left ear. My bellybutton, I would start breathing deep and slow in the mantra. I used to help me get over the loss was I'm okay. Here and he's okay. There thing and that I work with clients that have lost loved ones and it does work.

It helps reframe your relationship with the person. Now that there in the afterlife and you're here, it reframes it in yourself and your heart in your brain into your psyche so it's slow and peaceful as the breath gets deeper and slower.

The affirmation goes into deeper and deeper and it starts to rewire how your brain is working. It forms a new neural net, and how your thinking the Steins is just this is I have. This is Dick here.

Our lines are open, 305-541-2350. Again, this is the care and 80 that this is is my hope is in Jesus will and all all will will will and will and will and in all and in all and she all will all all and will will and wife can bring many difficult situations mystic violence, addictions, poverty and even sexual abuse by your loved ones.

The issue is not stay there, but to overcome all obstacles and show that with the love of God, your husband and your family.

You can succeed.

Love is the answer.

God is the key work reveals from a very sincere and honest position. Amy Cabo's life, a warrior who didn't give up and achieve the dream of her life. You can get to know more about her at her story on www.godisthekeyword.com or buying her book on Amazon.com and now we continue with Amy Cabo and the tour on 880 the big things can happen. I'm talking about PTSD, the company different ways different methods. I'm here trying to poison, back Carter and I wanted to ask you any what you're saying is very helpful think it's something that I might even use because you never know everything everything that might because family that I have is very packed that Thales may maintain any anti-Communist action or if anything I've seen on TV now at somebody candlestick tiles one or something. Two days later they say get this person for different anything.

I don't know if Hecate I don't know if I can understand and just yesterday I saw video of a girl that was blind faith, praying her in church and help us and she starts to see a handicap that is unable to log and people paying checks, he starts to walk again that people only believe in science. The 19th and here she doesn't understand to be suggested that the person believes that you feel sometimes there is no physical reason behind it can be what we do South suggest to ourselves that we have broken not capable of doing anything feeling like the happiness feeling like a destiny to suffer, and that there is no hope left for the rest if I lie in witnessing facing contest children. Others enough to keep this from the yeah prayer is Dracula miracle that the mind can explain that science can explain and I feel the next couple years. Hopefully there's some breakthroughs in quantum aspect of science and we start to learn more about what actually happens on different levels when someone is being prayed over and the tumor disappears toward like you said Riverwalk or able to see so I feel like were a few years away, but stuff could start to happen very soon because I feel that there is a turn with more quantum physics and quantum science that will be able to show what what's actually happening on an energetic level. Scenes from the praying of the team actions teams cooking since the team healthy doesn't mean often stopping counting like this stuff challenging. In fact I have an interview with somebody and these topics can be how abuse can be handed down from generation to generation, and I write about my daughter, Scott killed somebody. She had found in Texas, whom he had been house for a week, for 24 days not dying. Now I know she has PTSD spent three years, she's 25 and it is 15 is a lot of psychology in treasuries trained behavior teacher. What's the right way fairly kindly because they can very easily get offended and for now just so everything is not perfect. Didn't know it seems like everything's okay got that keeping me together. Trust me because I now that same tire doesn't speak hates speaking to her father speaks to my mother and I have a wonderful dysfunctional family wonderful.

It was a joke out of it, but that's good joke and say a lot feel like God is your central grounding cord and this is imperative for all of us to have that about that because life is great crazy planet.

Humanity is in the state of crazy emotions right now and I feel like where the cost of either evolving or devolved. So I really applaud you and that you have this platform to show your book your soul real and with PTSD when I heard a story about your daughter what's happening. It's so hard to connect with someone mentally and it is bypass it and go right to the love and then we think about where we get our love from their God right so it's almost like a touch a look a hug and embrace time together testing something most people think sometimes he placed 10 songs at a certain time, money specially needed right cell line is training all I can do from my conference call mainly, I can just pay for her pay the content however long it takes and I will forgive her. How many times it takes as God has forgiven me.

Another key component is getting really good at letting yourself off the hook you when you are saying about not making it.

Stuff like that really letting yourself off the hook quickly really learning self forgiveness and it had a lot of his perfection is who is a narcissist sell anything to narcissistic and stand to be perfectionist. I tend to be hard on myself. I'm aware of it. Your perfectionism to get good at mastering self forgiveness go trying to tell her that think you read mastering letting you digitalize it coming out of your back letting you go throwing it aside and walking forward and you really want to do right over the car is on different kinds of techniques I South suggest myself like I'm starting to feel bad I tell myself. God wants me to be of good cheer and then I remember of God's promises noise intensity, something like the devil and because I've got and I can win so then there was this morning that usual feeling bad so I'm thinking I know how long this will last know my typos in the bathrooms.

She plays go hand. The sound that comes on that song says everything you can file any pleasingly plump. FLS is taking here everything you write and then the next song is thinking. Next, like you learned from your expenses you constantly living and learning. It's something that happened next.

What else comes my way because I have got listening so thinking right cell and sunless no no no no more crying then at last.

Okay, I'm not a bad grade, that is really great when coaching somebody with depression and when it's really hard to I we got to make a playlist of like their top 25 favorite songs. It takes a while to go through and find that many songs but whenever there is a bed or it could be any point today whether driving those songs are on and there hard to not with and sing along with. So that kind of like this. Your spirit just from doing that. So music is such a big key I feel especially with depression, even if you not in the mood get the thing along with a purchase from hearing it click into your brain and then it starts to wake you up and get you back into yourself again so much memory of enjoying that's all your body knows. I do enjoy the salt muscle. This is sometimes a hot sallow work. Sometimes something bad and I'll start paying my video. It's very easy. There's not enough he's saying this song.

There's storyline all I have to do this today my mind. I don't even have to keep count. That's basically not. And for some reason I'm looking cell. That's right yes I want to talk about God from the central component to show you know your book. Your mission really seems like the only reason I meditate it so that I could hear him when he talks to me. So for me, prayer is what I'm talking to him in meditation is what I'm listening and my driving desire to meditate, so I can clear my mind up so that if you want to tell me something I'm available this time I was very blessed that I had no one in the world. It was just me now is done, the Townsend, the only thing I can do attempt to guide there is no other choice for me and attachment these guys incontinent close at the shell and guys now that my life would be Friday from two to 2:50 PM one half can you guys are welcome to call.

This is take care. I am your host to 880 and here is emailing trains for me and I will say no say I don't care Jan and God is the key work reveals from a very sincere and honest position. Amy Cabo's life, a warrior who didn't give up and achieve the dream of her life. You can get to know more about her at her story on www.godisthekeyword.com buying her book on Amazon.com and now we continue with Amy Cabo to work with Amy. Cabo was brought to you by IM IC research 786-310-7477 or www.godisthekeyword.com.

Tune in every Friday at 2 PM for Q1 with Amy Cabo right here on 880