Out of Control

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Welcome masculine journey. We are very glad to have you today in the it's kind of a different topic for us. I think everybody's kind of feeling it right now, but you don't always have the words for and so the topic of the show the title. The show is called out-of-control and really what Kate were kind of came about as were talking last week after the show and I was complaining actually is work and came out I was complaining about iWork residential construction and so far through the whole Kovic 19 stuff you know we've been considered essential work and so would been grateful to be able to continue to work and that's been a very positive thing until it hit a wall last week and it was like no one really wanted to work insecure by the came out there come the job site and find a reason why they couldn't work and might have to convince him to work.

Are you not have to do something to get them to work and for example I had a utility worker come out and was not in a centimeter on the house. The gas water could be electric right could be this and so why some puppets at a meter in the house. I Incessantly done some work and they started to leave. I stopped and that's what you doing why are you leaving her stuff my way. I walked over there and literally it was guys working on the trust, which is just a simple wood framing thing I said that night. Yeah, my movement like any work now is yeah I took that it was a week for that and I was complaining about it and we were all talking and became you know the realization hit that right now.

Everybody feels out of control. Everything is dictated to them right now in our society that's initially a bad thing I'm missing.

That's reality, it's a bad thing.

It feels like it. You know you can go you can play both sides of the coin that itself is have less deaths. All that kind of stuff right. I don't know where the truth lies in that what I do know is that something that we as Americans are not used to yeah that's what I meant by it's a bad thing.

It's just I can't stand being told what to do now. I probably would've done all the things that you know the governors of whoever state you know said to do but don't tell me I have to because dad gum and I'm not. I was planning on taking out the trash, but now that you've demanded it know I'm not taking out the trash anymore. That's true and that's you know that's kinda what I'm saying is it's it's a horrible thing for a man to be told what to do with respect to the do not touch the pain yeah first thing I do see wet paint. Do not touch still strike me that's a whole philosophy that the way the recently wired and that's what we been living for this last, whatever weeks you nonsuit over the realization came as we talked was people felt so out of control that they grasp it to control anything they can control right and I can be a healthy thing.

There can be a very unhealthy thing and and so in, in terms we talked about a lot it's got a small story versus larger story right so the larger story is yeah the whole world is under this pandemic.

But the small story is I'm really tired of it now and it's affecting me. Well yeah it's affecting all of us but it's me right now mean that someone is really affecting and so it we fall into that small story and we do we start trying to grab hold of something that we can control. Absolutely you during this whole Kovic 19 thing you know we we live are in phase 1 feels very much the same as the other phase, except a couple more businesses are open but what I noticed is is working in construction, I am required to go to Lowe's every now and then get supplies for the job site it ends. I saw this cartoon.

It didn't frighten when defining anyone else that I thought it was hilarious was his people setting on the beach and the people walked up to him and said that the beach police like up and said hey sorry it's not safe for you to be here go to Lowe's that's been true to Lowe's. Every time I go. It's like people everywhere and I remember when we were taking these classes to be a foster parent, which was kinda cool and one of the things that they taught us is right after you adopt a foster child, the chances are they will run away and the reason that they will run away is because they have no control over what is taken on and that once can happen in their life and the only way they can take control of their future is to run away and so exactly what what you're talking about the sky. Sam, I'm not gonna work so he can take control of his situation, whatever that might look like in the case of kids when you think of when they begin to run away what they are telling you is I feel out of control but sometimes it gets to the place like especially for runaway youth are not running away from a bad situation. I mean it's it's not a good choice even on the jobsite to the Davidson people to do flooring for a living so they couldn't do the flooring because her homes in the concrete. I went over and looked and it was all within what the manufacturer says they can do this again, go ahead and do it and I'm talking to their boss, and his his reasoning was well afraid works going to dry up at some point and so they don't take any risks and saints, so they're not gonna work and make any money today because of money, their faith, and abilities. Six months now. That doesn't make any sense, you know.

But when you get in this time we feel like you gotta have control. You don't always make sense what you doing you can imagine how the guys felt on Apollo 13. Some of the scroll left.

Remember that on TV, others not so much to set up the clip at all sure as we were talking about this. I just you know try to think of different things where you know were not in control and and we usually don't know it until it's almost too late right and so as your listing in this clip. I think everybody's probably familiar with the Apollo 13 and this is yeah this is that clip the Houston we have a problem. Click insert, but listen to it with this idea of okay. I just figured out something's wrong. I'm not in control here and and then will move deeper into Houston we have a problem.

We have a name I know what you are all not reading it all 25 psi calling one what's going on your flight back. You GNC like they're all over the place and keep going and patient problem or we can really that was a very interesting clip.

Very interestingly, the mastermind kind of sounds like Andy is sitting in the massage chair in the studio instead of on my he is totally defenseless right now Robby is looking voraciously to respond trying to figure out what main buzz be wonderful thing. Why is it a give and not an example lock in all his acronyms you now mean it's one after the other department spoke to me and there is when he says it's showing a quadruple failure.

That can't happen all yet can. It happens almost coming. I call that Tuesday right a quadruple failure. I'm not in control here. I got you know all of those different things and so what happens is we all start losing our minds and that's what you hear. And that clip is everybody's gone no none. There's no way this can't be happening in the one guy at Harris's character is kind of you know the hero and the zero at times in this movie in but he says are at one at a time people listless, just calm down for a minute, which is a good thing but yeah, you can have quadruple failures go back before this whole thing.

I can only speak for myself and I watch what was happening in other countries neck. I kept thinking will obviously happen here right. You know, there's no way that our country is going to shut down. There's no way that this is going to happen.

There's no way that's going to happen and then it just Happening right now. I didn't believe that any that was really going to be possible in I wasn't thinking logically, obviously, but United set up a will there's no way this is going to happen. Yet it does biblically act at this picture is a little bit. It shouldn't be at all comical, but it is a little bit, no there's Peter and the boys the night and Jesus is arrested. Click Robby are making the skylight. You know what you think about it Peter you know she's there arresting Jesus Houston we have a problem there arresting God here. So what does he deal. He pulls out a sword right like you are your St. Tammany communication here like you know you have the ears like I'm making Mac OS right now is therefore but the point is, is he's trying to grab control.

I mean he's he's doing right. You see it's our first response right panic. What I do what I do and so we just we first think of the mind we we tend to jump towards that.

This past week I'll send down the Georgia and my car broke down three hours into the trip in Waynesville of all places right you got a sense of humor that this is Wayne talking her for 97 in the past I would have really gotten angry would and it started to want to sit in with them. I okay got you told me to go down here I'm doing what you said to do and this happens like really, it was a 5 o'clock on a Saturday can get a rental car.

All the shops are closed on calling around and and I just sit back and I just sit still and and and start to remind myself that his word is truth. And if all things work together for the good of those who love him than something good is going to come out of this that still yet to see that my car is still in Georgia but it was like that the whole weekend the whole the whole whole time. Even the rental car that I got to come back was that you had trouble the whole time you're getting better gas mileage. Right now I fear that to look forward to cars in Waynesville Georgia. It is well that's pretty ironic that the I think that we do grasp it, anything that we can take control of and I think it made the point that in counseling that they often tell you to do that correct yeah when when things are out of control. One of the first things that a counselor will do is say okay, listless look at the things we can control and so after the break will talk about that masking journey.org. Listen has podcasts will be Boot Camp information and eventually were hoping pretty soon have a update there will have a quite ready yet returned. Assuming things can open up again masking journey.org download previous podcast or contact us from our friends at my pillow and change overproduction to make mass for hospitals, but they still had plenty of products are right now. Truth listeners can buy one get one free on most products, pillows, Giza bedsheets towels even neck pillows.

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Use the promo code car guy@mypillow.com sales. If it feels like every day is picking a fight. We can listen to the masking journey and find out why we use clips like the to illustrate the story, God is telling in the lives of truth is God designed you find which fights do we pay will grab your gear and come in every Saturday is assuming masking my son Eli. We talked about ways you can help support Lily smiled as he was on the information that Facebook.com where you can click the button tweaking it once again, PO Box 552 7285 no that the answers always Jesus that since we were in no Sunday school you always answer that you not to be wrong, but how often do we really take that mindset of Jesus take the wheel. To be honest with yourself and all start out not as often as I really need to never mean I do in certain situations. My notes totally outside my control and I went to counselor one time and eat and he gave me the count to 10 trick you know when because I was really struggling with anger and it really.

I know it's hard to believe it's really hard to believe you mean you know what I recall that yesterday so it was the count to 10 thing and and I'm still that way I don't have to count to 10, but to to answer your question, it's usually about nine that I go all God, 00 Jesus, 00 okay after I've thought of 72 different ways where I can take control of the situation and fix it or manipulate people to fix it for me or or whatever it's only after those things and in the Holy Spirit, you know, scorn is not a good idea. There you know that I finally go.

All you you can help with this and you know I just I admit that I'm there but I liked what Wayne you know was saying and it hit me as Wayne was talking right for winter break that you know Peter grabbed his sword well done. I wish I always grab my sword when things happened like that the biblical sword right because it is the perfect tool you know I mean, if nothing else it might not.

I might not be able to go to the exact answer that I need right then, but I can probably find some comfort, some encouragement, some patients and peace some understanding until those answers to come as functional Google the parts you want to find like I for I take out a copy exactly right. Yeah, I think we see evidence of the problem quite frequently owned vehicles.

Since God is my copilot.

Guess what somebody is in the wrong seat yeah and I watch others people drive they need got especially the ones that won't zipper merge heralds burning holes in this type of throw that in there.

I think there is this challenge that we have, especially his men know this is masking. This is primarily geared towards men.

Men are fixers and that's kinda how we are wired. And that's not new to anybody. You know there's a great clip on YouTube.

It's it's not about the nail.

You know it's funny to watch it so much truth to it on both sides of the equation and we also often get paid in our profession to solve problems, and so were rewarded financially were rewarded with accolades. You were encouraged to solve issues you know and some level that is probably healthy and some level that becomes unhealthy and so you get to the clip where it's beginning it's pretty healthy. I could have chaos and someone has to take control of the chaos incident you want talking about this clip. Well, it's when all these guys come together and there there finally figured out auto you know a quadruple failure is definitely happening and so how do we get from that to get these guys back and pretty much chaos ensues because men when they don't know what to do get angry and fearful. It no combative and that's what happens and so you'll hear a little bit of that argument. Thankfully for you listeners weekly cut a lot of the argument out, but this place great guy got level was told was given damaged and explosions was considered a like that thing up below works is to risk I can take that chance anything the command module is good for his reentry so that leaves us with the land which means guys around the moon flout the limb engine make a longer speed get home as quick as we can, Jean. I'm wondering what the agreement we can't make guarantees. We designed the limbo land on the moon not bar the engine out there.

Well, fortunately when I landed on okay what anything was designed to do care about what you can do is get to work with later taking control the situation honestly needs to happen, but there's a difference between getting it out of chaos in controlling and that's what we talked about rep for the break and you said you know in the counselor's office. Sometimes we hear that the counselor will you know most of the time people go to counselors when there's a crisis on both imagine that they seldom do they go to counselor to good thinking. I kinda need a tuneup right now but crisis happens and so you go into the counselor's office.

Or, you know those of us who have been counselors with with folks you know a guy is sitting down and he's just laying it all out there and Selena were, like okay okay wait.

I well so right. I know you wanted a perfect marriage. I know you didn't want your wife to have an affair.

I know that you didn't want to become a porno graphic you know Ed addict. I know that you didn't want your kids to smoke dope. I know all of that, but that's happened so were not landing on the moon anymore. Arley Solis figure out where were at list. Think about the things we can control and one of those things is me. I can't really control my wife. I can control my kids. I probably can't even control my addiction but I can control my relationship with God. I can control to an extent not only be careful about that.

I can give control to God. There and trust him. Jesus take the wheel. But that's scary because we don't know what we don't know which attorneys gonna take we don't we don't know which roadies going to take me down and so to do that is a very scary thing. I was having a conversation with the young man this week that you know he he thinks that he's got evidence of his wife having done these things or whatever and so what's he doing he's checking out the Facebook account. He's checking out the phone he's, you know, looking through all the records he's going through the bank account.

He's you know he's coming over everything he's going to take control and it just broke his heart and he couldn't even hear it from me when I said that's that's not gonna work. It's gonna blow up in your face. You have to let go. It's a fascinating thing that when you look carefully at the curse.

You know that Adam brought upon himself that that word when you look into the deep meaning of it has to do with something that's off purpose and something that will lead to frustration and so you know if you're like me in my mother-in-law since I'm just a certain way and off my mind goes, it starts what I call running scripts like, say this, do this better than all the Scripture running somebody get control because this is got to stop all of that leads to frustration. If I can somehow or another. Put that on the elder surrender Jesus take the wheel than he can bring life, which brings fruit, love, joy, peace, patient kindness, goodness, faithfulness to you are not the opposite of the curse. The curse will always lead to death will always lead to frustration and and the same thing. If you think about it with pornography right if you take that route. Road you're going to be so frustrated you can think how in the world I find myself here or if you'd went there with alcohol or if you went there with whatever underneath the curses his level of frustration that is unbelievable compared to letting go put it on the altar Jesus take the wheel and it leads to life, so this amazing thing that hard to turn over the rest.

It's hard to turn over the reins because we have an expected destination for me.

That's it. It's yes the turning over is okay and I do pretty well at that but when it's not going to the place I think it should go. I want to grab the wheel again. You know, because I I wanted to be the certain way. If it's going to lead me back to that perfect marriage is it's not really me back to that completely restored relationship. The way I think it should be noted, it's hard not to grasp control.

NetSuite's can have faith that Jesus is going to take it where it needs to go. The other part of that is there's another person in that equation regardless of its relationship you to be between friends or could be between employer and employee that there's other people in that knowing Jesus could have a desired outcome where it goes in the pocket right next to the plays in there as well. But Jesus will still make good use of it and find life for you if you continue to walk with him and you are talking about that and and Joseph comes to mind you, here's a man who had a dream that his brothers were gonna worship him and bow down to him not worship in the bow down to them as as a Kenyan and his life gets thrown into turmoil and and he could win a different route and gone to God and said you showed me this and and he made the best out of all those things and it comes back down to what you just said relationship. You know ultimately that's where God is trying to get us into the place of relationship with him when even we even within the churches and things worked or taught in some business to be in control. I go on Sunday I go on Wednesday. I do these things.

I checked my boxes and and and everything is good and then wrenches get thrown in and we all freak out, but he is he is trying to get us to that place of relationship where we do sit down, we do listen to Joseph's case of being the whole thing conifers wife if he could without alarm in this great direction right unlimited things are going to finally work out curve wicked curve right not to the destination. But God had the longer-term plan you got had it, even if people gotten away say that if God's plan.

God's plan will prevail. I got God will find restoration of the heart Will find a way to get your heart where it needs to go to be in that right wishes to him first and that's the key that's relationship is restored and the others will follow in the place instantly feel out of control misplaced your security got I just had to get this to you make it or leave it with you not leaving it with the trust that you can take me where I need to go whether I know where that is not to. Thanks for listening this week were going to continue on the after hours talk about this little bit deeper into the topic and talk about what to do when you're out of control