Wound-to-Healing After Hours

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This is Mike Swick from if not for God podcast our show stories of hopelessness turned and I hope your chosen Truth Network podcast is starting in just seconds. Enjoy it, share it, but most of all, thank you for listening and for choosing The Truth Podcast Network. This is the Truth Network, the heart, masculine journey after our time to go to be more transparent on the topic covered masculine journey starts here welcome to masculine journey after hours in unity. This is so were talking about the wound, right, and if you missed the first episode. The regular podcast the radio show we we touch on some certain things if you retouch on those again a little bit so we talked about in the wounding.

We have that we acquired one of things I want to really point out as we talked a lot about the father wound that previous show but your wounds can come from all over the enemy doesn't just choose your father's will and you know that's the one he likes to do because he wants to take you adding in and experiencing friendship with God is your father, but you know he'll use whatever he remained he doesn't play fair.

We were just talking and he doesn't play by the rules like there is rules and in spiritual warfare, but he does not play by the rules things were. You know just how you know a lot of our wings, and a young age and we have to get them healed. We have to go back to that when they happened at that age happened.

It's hard to heal something and just only look at it from the perspective that you see it as an adult, you really have to go back and get the feeling that you had and I think I haven't been to counseling to speak to talk about the wound specifically but I think you guys have and they say a lot of good councils will take you back to that place where you wind if the child and we also, linked back to last week show in the pose and let the posies a lot of time to cover-up and hide it.

I think there had to be a wound in during the fall whenever the wound that came was you know naked here animal is naked you know when he didn't realize that in there was a wounding in that because he there was something severed between he and God. So in the same way you know we have to deal with those ones that we have been in in the same way of being, separated from God really healing the wound is going to bring you closer to God. If it doesn't, it's gotta be some kind of counterfeit healing. I think the danger that we run as is adult if we've had that woundedness as kids is we can think through it, rationalize it, process it were processing it.

At the age where we are today right and really what God needs to take you back is that place where you couldn't process it as a kid and heal that spot right is knowledge. You know it when they were at the garden of Eden. There were two trees, either gently of life and the tree of knowledge that knowledge will give you lots of things but it will never give you license right right and so getting knowledge of something is good. You gotta seek the life in the midst of it. Okay, got, I understand this more now I need you to take me where I need to go you know I was reading the book while at heart when you talk about on the show before it it it talks about the father wound to stop there because I was like you that had his issues. I can point a couple things but they're not really that big a deal, and it's because God had another wound he needed to work on me with it came from a family member right until that when got out of the way.

He really couldn't work on the other ones I know that was the great blockade and that was my Suez Canal boat and there was a lady asked her right and so you got had to get that out of the way and then yeah he took me back into some stuff about my dad stuff about my mom that I love dearly, but she had something she wasn't perfect and there were some things that she did or didn't do that wanted me that we all take wounds throughout her life, but God knows the order they need to be processed and formed a really get to the healing thing. Another thing to do is we talked with at the end of the last program two was a lot of these wounds, we owe all them too much. They really are necessarily ours. We were tempted into something we believed it was all less when we were in no way were drug in their unwilling. We were we were given more than we could handle at a particular age, something really came at us and for what ever note the enemy is a liar that he is will tell us it was our fault and it's really not our fault.

So I think were ready to move on to the clip with Robby if you can set that up. This is from the movie hacksaw bridge and you may be familiar with Desmond Doss who won the Congressional medal of honor for you know going into battle without a gun and and so you see throughout the movie. This in a young man who just refuses to take a gun. He takes a lot of heat for all that came from somewhere and it came from a wound and so when we see this clip is actually up on hacksaw originality is been trying to help out people you know, not defend himself, and is in the foxhole of the southern young man and he's beginning to tell him the story of what was actually behind the wound.

You know that set up him not being able to use a gun and so will take from just such decrease, so you know there's a story and you want things really help me at boot camp personally was I thought my story was just normal, you and I think everybody did and somebody said you know you you find somebody what was your childhood like qualities to tie map and Barb wire you know and and beat me, relax, handle well that's probably not more okay.

But if it's your story you think it's normal and some for Desmond and his father coming home and beaten on his mama know that was his story and all the sudden he had this phenomenal outbreak of of emotion in trying to protect his mother and and he saw what he was capable of. If you put a gun in his hand when he was out of control. As a what would appear to be 12 or 13-year-old boy. If you were to see the clip and so what you see here is that is actually even more what we talk about boot camp is he he not only makes an agreement he makes a vow that I never gonna do this, which obviously God allow that to create a hero because that's what Desmond Doss was however he would really like to get inside and and you can see the emotion and you know Desmond, himself, obviously had phenomenal capabilities had not worked into you know where. Where is his broken heart. Getting healed because at this point time you can see in his heart still is still a lot of guilt there.

Instead of just healing and moving on. He's doing what he's doing not picking up again in my opinion the normal weight route would be to do that, you know, serving your country or whatever, but it was out of guilt now again like I said we all all all only all of this would do more of picking not taking guns up glass and doing trying to heal or whatever if he did, but with that said I still think there was some brokenness there like, oh, absolutely. And you know again how many of us in the fit of rage because of something that we were duped into then made agreements and valves that were really, you know, in agreement with something that's not true. One of the verses that really is always help me heal some is when Paul says that not do the things I don't want to do don't do the things I want to do and for the many years I missed the punchline on that which is.

But it's not me, it's the sin within me and that's where you can forgive yourself. That's also where you can forgive those it will get you and that now it's it's the enemy that's wounding you it's not mom dad brother sister self and as he has put out it. It is true that I'm very good at sticking the gun to my head and pulling the trigger.

Rather than shooting at somebody else and I think the end. Often the enemy uses other people to voice his hatred towards us in. And so, yes, that that person falls into that. The role Jan allows it to happen and there's a forgiveness of that person that needs to happen at some point forgiveness of self. They Robby talked about the first showing it was really thing for me, the forgiveness of self is the hardest thing you know, because the enemy has you really worry want you when you can't forgive yourself is your stock in the thing is he'll use things that are partially true. As we talked about before. And because you that's partially true. You think the whole thing is true in being able's okay got help me only see the truth in that, and wears a lie where's the agreement wears the place that I'm being held in bondage in and a prisoner to the enemy because I won't forgive myself. I won't forgive somebody else and and and give me some breakfast, a lot of some beautiful movies done by Jefferson more this Christian director.

If you ever have a chance to watch one of them, but he's got one called one message about this woman who you know she got breast cancer and fiancé pulls all the shenanigans while she's gone through all that and she's having a hard time forgiving him and she goes and it is deep depression and the person that is an account of the Jesus rescuer in the movie comes to her and says you don't forgive that person because they deserve to be forgiven.

You forgive that person because Jesus forgave you all turned it on for yourself for a second okay you don't forgive yourself, because you deserve to be forgiven. You forgive yourself. Because Jesus is CNMI, call him wrong. Well, probably not a good idea just wouldn't play out.

It does get convoluted. The sometimes these wounded places that we pose. You know and try to protect or we won't let God heal it. It drives us in. We get good results from it.

It's not always negative.

It's not always a II kicked the dog yelled at the cat. Whatever, you know, the cases are no was mean to my kids and my wife is sometimes driven. This will make you not want to fail is that you work all these extra hours.

Do what it takes that to not fail right in C rewarded for that and then you get rewarded that say okay even better off just staying in this place will know you can still do well and be healed. And that's a whole thing that you know the enemy really Canada. He hit you on every side and try to avoid you getting that place healing yeah will thicken tries lot of things be an impact in my life I word for the year was heritage and I thought that was really cool.

At the beginning, now or in the not so cool part. I think the thought came to me and we were talking that I have sacrificed my life on the altar of acceptance more the looks and just to be a part of something as was almost a masculine would his innovative father went and you realize in the year I was a skinny curlyhaired boy and I have overcome both of the fat now super God has blessed proposer and a but those are things that up until school-age lived out in the country and I was promoted only child and life was somewhat normal, whatever that was. I go to school.

I was in abdicated people picked old and daily – strive rest of my life being accepted by you, whatever the cost, which is what I think we talked about posing and that you trying to be active member in high school.

It was the it was the, the rednecks in the preppies date haole. What I would wear allows the cost start blue jeans and cowboy boots because I would sure which crowd I really want to be got a thing so psychotic if you will let you and Linda lots of different addictions in but begin to see and I knew at an early age. God gave me a warriors heart.

Here's a skinny kid who was an athletic wasn't that kind of guy and I thought that's what it meant to be a man and I had a dad who was easily loving father. He's a good man but he was quiet and so I didn't know how to process things, and I heard a speaker say went down without a host of diseases felt like he was an eight-year-old boy who God called all the eight-year-old little boys in the world to get us a look, here's what you got to do to get through life and just as he started talking. I had to go to the bathroom and when I come back and he said that's all you need to know I was too proud to ask any the other a little.

So I had to pretend I knew what was going out in us the way I felt most of my life get it in you. You can have a great father with the father is unable to express himself or to speak the words into you that they need to speak into you that really is a wounded wounded part its debtor writer, and later will we were hearing that Turpin back so hopefully like a super cricket proposing cricket superimposing you have another clip here you go and get to the yeah hasher so this is my clip, but we cannot live this we use at the camp. Talk about the wound and I watched quite a bit of anybody loves Raymond off and on through the years and this one is one where the girls that asked the guys Frank Robert and Raymond that that guy but track so the girls Avastin the go to counseling to kinda get in touch with their you know more emotional selves or whatever to be more open and you you know those guys never follow the rules so they end up at the racetrack and Batten and making money in, and that they get the talking over lunch one day and they've got an account of ordinate their stories to make sure that the girls really believe that they been going deeper into their and other back stories in their lives. What's going on and that's obviously pretty much leave it at that.

It's really humorous how they walk through it though about Frank and how he grew up and then how he treated those boys as they grew up, and yet I just really that you'll probably see some here of it in this that there's healing that comes from this you hear about the wound that Frank experience but Harry didn't really project that on the boy so much, even though you know heat. It was is a different kind of abuse to the little boys and what he receives from you because you thought it was like that with you. That's freaking very good.

I'm kind of allowed so so I just backed up one more grandpa Joe was the worst.

My grandpa's house. Very scary once made himself. My dad used to tell me horrible stories about how his father used to hate him when he went to get me so that you get everything that I was like that was like that for everybody that's just the way it was so that hit him. You and never really I couldn't. I don't know. I was always weakening him they didn't want to be like I didn't girls abide at so that clip. I was actually watching the show I'm sitting there indiscriminate track along and then all of a sudden Frank says yeah when he wasn't hitting me and about fell out of my chair exhibiting the message that allowed her to make everybody. Everybody loves Raymond's even telling the truth right in the situation you know and really that was something to help me later on as I had some issues with my dad and I was able to get with one of my older sisters talk my mom before she passed away and learn more about his life growing up in the more I learned about his life that he never shared. He was a quiet guy in that respect really help me understand that you know I had it so much better than he did in his own way.

Even though he's failed and wounded me anything with me the way he got wounded right and I start to have Jesus do the healing and that man's forgiveness was so much easier. At that point, when I realized while he really did try to stand in the gap in the gap is much as he could in some ways not pass those things down you can be hard on them and then you see opportunities to actually give them grace whenever you know the full story's varies well similar but different.

My dad you know he was really good at a young age, but then I told him to show that he might add, moral failure, had to leave the state to find other work and at 13. I went from a dad at home to not be around. My mom remarried and this guy wasn't the greatest domain, least he was there, but he was in a very hard on me and I wasn't used to that because my dad was loving but now he was absent so I didn't really have a lawn. So what are you, I guess what I should go back and look at dad story that I find out what his dad's that he was grown when this happened, but still want to send it to somebody. What did he want to do to try to make sure and he did a lot, even after he had left to try to come back and fix those problems. And then I found out you know who raised my dad actually was a drunken grandfather deleting stuff so you know a lot of the brick that really is.

Essentially, it's a progressive thing and it may not just be like that, but it is the breaking of generational curses. I believe in and somebody take taken a step up and say no I'm not gonna wound like I was going you and also the story would like to share talking okay one of clichés really that you hear in counseling a lot but it's a cliché as most of more because it's true, is that wounded people. When people and if you can and you said it, you know once you knew where that was coming from your father. It's a whole lot easier to forgive them and I guarantee you everybody that hurts you as been hurt and may be worse than they hurt you.

And if you can consider that, then the forgiveness of them is easier and again for me. That makes it tougher for myself, but I'm I'm getting there. Yet it is hard you know it and I think the people don't give the enemy's credit is in the role that he plays it he may not of been the one that did that they beat you that molested you that it verbally abused you, she's 100% behind the message that comes with that of you should never allow that to happen. It's really your fault or you wanted that to happen at some level, it's really your fault, right or you and your dad never loved you.

You know you're not lovable in whatever the things that come behind that is an agreement that's really where he gets a foothold for for a long time and when I process it now on the remarried years later that my actual father. Father wound. You know the one that I would say okay yeah that's my father was really never spoken that I assumed it based on things that my father had said in the way he acted, which was I'm a disappointment okay and you know I would get blessed and good grades and you know I would see the look on my dad's face is not like he's can say your disappointment. You don't have what it takes whatever but I interpreted all those things and I continued actually to interpret those clear through most of my adult life, until it was in my 60s that I realized I'm hearing this voice actually had a boot camp that I was teaching at this boot camp you know one of her other guys got there responding and he said you know I was here in this your disappointment in your and I'm like oh man, I hear that all the time. I'm a disappointment. Where is that coming from and all of a sudden I started bawling because he realizes actually come coming from something. I thought my father believed he never spoke it in their but the enemy and interpreted it for years and I had internalized it to where I was doing things in my life that were as effective. What I believe to be true, which was completely a lie so you know it's it's it's it's not necessarily that I had bad dad so is pretty hard. Take that out to go okay here's where my father spoke that but he didn't say it but by listening to the internal messages. I was getting. I pinpointed it back to where I really felt that was coming from and if my earthly father who adored me I was a disappointment him what kind of a disappointment I might've gone in good I got a frank top story that I never knew one of my grandfathers had both passed away still too young to remember anything but what I know is that the my paternal grandfather in a very violent temper, and he beat my father. My father never even gave me a spanking. I was very bad. The bus well I learn this mother and so I passed that on my son that I gave pleadings not with the fact that more than I should have been anger. He hasn't done that is story told Raymond thing is true.

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