25- Does the Outside World Define Us?

Brought to you by ICU research can bring many difficult situations, domestic violence, poverty and even sexual by your love ones welcome Amy Cobb and the QI have read library Friday and on a deacon is an online got insecure.com and later this. I will be available at the podcasts you throw webpages. God is the.com I sell covers topics such as how to overcome trauma abuse. Common misconceptions treatment healing options and positive behaviors as well, as we provide education for testimonials and awareness and to professionals in the field today.

I am joined by Dr. Boris McCullough of and we have a very special guest with Kirk Nair and he tell you a little something about Patrick.

He's a motivational speaker featured in Forbes speaker thought leader, a suicide survivor and author Kirk shares his insight and the lessons learned in his latest book, document, and today the topic that we will be discussing is the question that a lot of us ask ourselves just the outside world defined and I can tell you from my point of the my actions do not depend on how people judge my actions only depend on God's judgment.

It's my relationship with God matters the most, not how the world relates to me. I've been judged most of my life but the only judgment that consents me is God, not even my own because I can be a tough critic when it comes to myself and Quinton Emily this morning. I saw on the news ACT scores, requiring personal questions like what he read how much he parents me what your family dynamics and I believe that working hard doing the right thing. Having the right attitude a little bit of self-discipline in making the grade should be enough. We should not be defined by your second chances of ethnicity are belief or the belief of fathers, but by our abilities, and by what we have to offer cell. I like to sent to you Kirk Abner your program.

My supervision on this show. Kirk and I have to tell you that I was a little bit about you and I know that your motivational speaker and you been even recognized by the president on Dragon which is amazing but specialize in things that are so important in today's world that he deals with specialize in triggering personal development. Finding motivation living with awareness moving towards actually station practicing mindfulness maximizing relationships, making diverse city universal avoiding depression, suicide prevention, and being unconditional love. But would you like to start when it comes to the role of the finance and is that you don't know what Andrea was a lot like spaghetti junction but the report program. I like the life of contradiction. I have a yellow I had a wonderful childhood growing up in red) all really good job audio riled up, go to private school. I went on the college world was likely recognized by Ronald Reagan work I was doing so is why my life will look normal, but it was normal and that's why would be so unbelievable just so ironic or 20 years after I graduated I reached such a depression.

I was so miserable like I had come to the conclusion that the only reason I have been born with.

I think I would ever enjoy eternal happiness for myself. I wasn't suicidal depression on a couple of occasions over.

I tried in my own life. But the regulations forge mother move beyond that rough patch and start this journey up and over the last 20 years ago. I just felt so thankful him go with the really remarkable all these basic principles without that are critical in our pursuit of happiness in the class what my latest book is about flower, dog, man of principles that I think each one of us can hear and listen.

The use of our lives in our pursuit of happiness. Well yes, I believe this is an excellent, excellent reviews and everything and you have a lot of lessons to share with the world and very grateful for people like you interesting question.

How can people rediscover themselves. How do they embark on this personal journey to talk about the confined to the truly are as human beings. It was bathing in our lives to get us to start reconsidering what we are billing who we are always on the right path. The knot was certainly an example of that, and my hope is for your audience the day and with the book the people to be more what I would say prophylactically that they can do these will start looking and considering the different changes they might be able to incorporate in their own lives without having to get the bottom example of the final graduation time for schools all over the country and a lot of hard-working kids out there that are graduating in the full expectation is that once they get the college degree that the farmer get that job to write down about it right now. Settle down. The assumption is that by default all be happy will discover that I don't think that's really the that's the way we all become happy. In fact, all those things that are important, but they're truly not the most important things that we have about ourselves and I would suggest that really what my premise is that I believe that when you're born, you're given a name in your perfect human being and what that means is there's nothing that you have to prove it to yourself or anybody you have to prove your your humanity is actually when you're on your unconditional love and you have the complete and full potential to remain unconditional love all the days of your life but unfortunately for most of us we start losing side of that as we get older and older.

Well, you simply start defining ourselves otherwise so that I do agree with you.

That's my point is to believe all meeting Christ and therefore when we had kind it's because we were born that way. One perfect and sometimes when our actions actions can make it stray away from and we can you know sometimes make bad situations and that that I saw a feature on Tina Delong saying well people their heart they really wanted to. That means they want to be selfish. They want to be greedy. It will do all that and then God comes in messages doing changes your heart and I was wondering who was right.

Well, I agree with your premise.

I think we are on will love what that means is that we can love ourselves. We love other people the same way. So what it really looks like.

As we start to lose that comes what I think our ultimate journey in the best the best that we can do is to try to regain that a long way, are you there I guess. Okay, on filtering okay yes yeah I just talking. I am I doing today right after the break that I'm sorry you are talking about starving yourself and finding you really are not letting the role define you because a lot of times we find that by what people think or how everyone else testing or how it's supposed to be me and I'll give you an example for every wrong that's done, people expect justice right.

That's what society tells you now with all the wrongs that have been done in my life. It was my own family and other people have found me. I can't against injustice by justice is not necessary for me, my justice was in you will not be needed. Happiness being able to be grateful if you please give us the honest, hard-working and loyal and ought to get attributes have acquired a result of everything I have come the most of all, my ability to lead and closer relationship with God is very honorable your approach. There readers mantra of an eye for an island that was totally legal way to compromise or settle conflicts with people but your approach still being able to love someone unconditionally no matter what they get inflicted or done to you, but I think that's really behaving the way that Jesus would have you really think that we react that way, but we truly are is a Holy Spirit is just something so incredible and beautiful to behold. Just amazing because I see that one thing that you work with CVs that include stinking like Jesus I find amazing because I think Jesus gave the best example possible life and trust me, I've tried. I tried to live the life that Jesus taught us even try to keep the 10 Commandments and I always been successful, at least try. I think that's what God expects of us to try and read in case but there's only three things you need to do in life do the right thing always tried to do the right thing and in the second thing last whenever you do direct to the best of your ability to believe everything that is very important because if you're not doing the right thing and not getting the best of your ability things that mess up your bill ability is only hurting yourself. Your you're right on target.

Truly amazing to me.

It sounds "all in love other people same way. So now the human race is made out of very very difficult process. Why would you the biggest problem in the human condition as we really don't understand who we are.

She would be the only thing we know who we are as human beings and inevitably left on the calls conflict or disappointment, happy endings, ugly yourself and the other person's shoes and try to understand their point of view helps you know helps conversation going and says that sometimes are concerned about the way that we see things the way that we would do things that we would feel we have to understand that he has to be like everyone else he could be different. They could step outside the box we could set a good example don't have to let our society, the environment anything else define I think only God can define since the day we were born there is probably one of our most vital exercises that we do is human is just how often we judge other people know what I discovered Portland my life. The only thing I can truly control is what Bell and Poland lifetime to figure that out but what how I interpret that the lady is like a controlled another person. Why do I need to be judgmental about that person. For example, invariably one of the most love, video why the rod of our society more sewage sitting in the office of the president you will know is not part of our civic responsibility to voice our opinion each and every day on social media about what we think the president is doing. So I made a deliberate later.

The deliberate practice that I do not I do not participate in those times. Conversation because while discovered for myself when I do that they do not take me down that path towards genuine happiness. In fact, I find it participating in those just getting extremely agitated and really know my with my voice not regard wouldn't have any impact at all. So that's one about one of the practices that follow are referred to as noise ration I choose not to be a part of the noise that I hear all around me everyday if you hardly think I have office in high school, but I never will we come back about how people can be comparing themselves with colleagues at work that social media friends and neighbors.

And this is very interesting this would be great for anyone that's just tuning in any capital, and this is the key here and now we continue with daily gobble in the 218 80 have a care today have come things in society as well.

Special guest Also. We had someone call man by the name of Lillian hello Lillian here on the air.

I Lillian Marilyn and you know recently you discovered that I am your second cousin so I want to talk about that whole self validation were all born into this world innocent and pure and trusting and childlike in life and humanity happens to things happen that hurt very deeply. I don't think that I have received my validation for healing from humanity so much as in prayer from God himself. I have read your book and I had to put it down several times, because I would.

I broke down in tears and cried. I wish more than anything I would've been present to you and I wish we would've known of you, but your your mom kept us away from you will back in touch now. I mean, yes, my mother calling US, the nine of us the savings we didn't know we had and uncles and cousins. Just recently I did 23 and me. We could tell, and I have maybe I'll just give it you what their childhood and adult and I can tell you that only God can take that away together some static music in the background here what I want is that I understand, because as a child I had a situation and as an adult. I had a situation that broke my heart and it broke my faith.

I was abused by a Roman Catholic nun and ended tell you that only God can take that pain away. Only he can heal you in prayer we wait around for humankind always here are silence and people don't know how to handle that people don't know what to do and only God are all of our healing from all the stuff that happens in this life comes to the throne of grace from going to God in saying I can't do this by myself. I need your help. I need to get through this and then if we allow ourselves to he reaches to our pain, and he transforms us and makes us stronger and then we can advocate for others who are hurting and we can be better people and we always good people and we are all born innocent in its share your testimony with Lillian because I understand what it's like to feel at that and I guess character sees at one point tried suicide. I know what that's like, I can tell you a few times I've I thought I might've died for me that's the correct did you wanted to ask you because we are talking about Lillian. What you don't want to do you go to, need to maybe heal and media getting on with your life. How do we how do we survive in a world that still controlled by the social media. Either way that people view us by a colleague, aspiring neighbors. I understand one. If you are dead and live and find out where that line is where we and they began to care for second cleric.

Can you tell us a little bit about what we you were able to find it. Once he tried to solicit yourself and you find your way and you were even to help others. What would you tell somebody struggling in this way, that is just having a hard time adjusting okay so they went discovered yet start developing awareness of yourself and be able to see yourself in context. You know that's not natural for one of the things that I really try to practice it. One of the great things I look at life as being like a train ride, except his train that world doesn't go 60 miles an hour go 60 seconds a minute but the beautiful thing about his train ride of life that were on his. We do not have to carry any baggage form of disappointment always lived or loss, frustration or grudges. So no natures with the future that no matter how big the storm is the day tomorrow. The sun is going to come back up and I think we as human buildings we have opportunity and potential, but is so important.

We have to let mother nature in time, but I think one of the best ways that we can control the things we think about and we can perfectly control the things we talk about so I really am sorry about the events that happen in your life. What I discovered is the best thing that I can do to move beyond that for 20 something years. Do not bring it up in conversation is nothing that I think about I needed to bring it out because I am family and I wanted Amy to know when I read her book that I wasn't judging her and that I understood because you don't see fiber when you come up to somebody you say hey I'm a survivor. There are people that just basically say I want having to do with you.

Your weird saying something people are setting and I am just the start times.

I understand the many years that I went to depressants has always had to be loyal to God by prayer they realized that prayer wasn't enough, it wasn't enough.

I needed to believe that God loved me so bad about the things I had done and I felt like I was a terrible