Father Interviews His Son Part 2

This is Chris Hughes with the Christian perspective podcast with Chris Hughes.

We encourage our listeners to engage the culture with Jesus Christ your chosen Truth Network podcast is starting a just a few seconds. So enjoy it share but most of all, thank you for listening to The Truth Podcast Network this is Truth Network welcome to mannitol and brought to you by TA W. CM is talking and walking Christian men's ministry where they are devoted to breaking down the walls of race, challenging as our host will Hardy and Roy Jones Junior a black eye and a white man talk radio excited, having Joshua, welcome back. It was great to have you with this one last two I will pick the conversation back up about the young man in college and and how God's impact in your life so thank you for joining us again, thank you for having me Joshua one of the things were getting the last show with was around temptations and distractions and that sort of thing. I think you and indicators were close now that we got off Mike at the last show that you would like to pick back up on a few things were going down that conversation yeah and we're just talking about it.

Temptation of video games for a college student and man in a in your how how big of a distractions that so I think the distractions can be distraction and no matter who the person is right.

I think it's more a matter of how well are you managing your time, say for example in my apartment unites three Xbox is sitting in my living room all over there in place. How often they get using a weekly basis and they might get an hour between the three so it's it's about how you manage your time. You could if you cannot get to be a good student menu not to be disciplined and that's that's the fact that goes beyond college right once the discipline factor is ingrained or not ingrained in impact you there and also throughout life. Exactly. So I found to be not when I don't I don't have the time to be playing video games even if they were distractions, just not the case but now I think someone is not discipline can just just as easily fall in the trap of sitting in our couch doing nothing. You know, as as much as they would playing video games. That's a good point and no wonder some of the studies that we've we've referenced in the past is shown it to be a big distraction as it relates to men in general, not just college students and young men and men and like you said, many distractions can come in different forms is just we feel like I am with the things we've seen between death and the one you mentioned in last week show the pornography.

Those are two really really love that the major hits on young men and an even younger man these days, and certainly own even older man, which is ironic related to the gaming I think it goes back to the need for some sort of excitement in man's life and is some sort of competition is from what I've gathered from a lot of this game uses tremendous amount of gaming together people that may not be set aside of you could be another area or that may be on a different control panel or different system or whatever so those are just things that the folks usually watching out for. Be aware of it as fathers and this is husband's that you not to spend too much time in front of the TV year almost types of things. So to the pornography need to be totally away from the gaming to some degree in if it's a relaxation or an escape tool for half-hour so whatever you agree to with your family time. Let it be just certainly be aware of just back to the some of the things going on at school with you. Have you been involved with any specific ministries on campus. Yes, I have certain my freshman year I tried out several just here and there and I never pass mastery as active in about one or two but since taking up in discipling the minutes, but become the main focus right.

What led you into doing that. Spend time invested in other young men. What prompted you to get involved in this set is really you partially think it will partially man a God thing, but partially it's kind CCing that the potential need for it, and just wanting to see a change in him and his attorney Evans talks about the kingdom man the series or the book men are the foundation of the family matters as the looks of the foundation of the of the society is the family unit right in this command space to lead the family than you if you want to destroy the man you destroy the foundation of society as a as a household builds up a neighborhood neighborhood, a city, city, state, state, country, and so on. Singers want to be proactive about developing men to be ready for this challenge is an and to actually make you note spiritually lethal warriors writing on someone who just studied Nino got up I will say their whole life but they don't know how to use the weapon if they don't put in the practice exactly right. So with this group of young men your mentor know that your building into you said you had. I think seven or eight something like that between the twin, the two groups which are currently involved in. What do you see as the biggest hurdle that they had to overcome in this initial journey and every I think coming into it every every single one of those men has there and has earned temptation and the big I guess and it it wasn't even hard for them. I guess to get over to an extent. When I first started here, every single one of them was willing to admit it and be honest and open so you know I think that that's tough but I would say the biggest thing it is the time commitment and taking it seriously. This was one of those it.

If this is a discipline issue that got so many things have got to take care of you have some another slot of time to invest in relationship in the journey. Yeah. And I've certainly had some very disciplined people who were disciplining their acts and in their studies and lifestyles, but even if your discipline right you still have to put value on what we do there, so at first I would say it was it was kinda hard. You know, not for them but I had to really instill hey, this is important. This is what this is like number one pursue priority number one.

During your day during the day that we have it right like we had. We know well accountability and the time we have during the week is is the rock in the ocean right so it's it's steady and ever-changing. I guess you could say is everything around us every every week at the same time have accountability so you need to make sure you're making you planning around accountability you're doing your homework you doing your project anticipation of being out accountability.

So when you say accountability for our listeners. Let's let's understand what you mean what you say accountability and what does that look like without breaking any confidences but just from an overview what is your one of the types of questions you ask each other in an the lead me into my next point that Alaska wow just I would just ask. I would ask you.

I picture the one thing you never told anybody was the one thing that you never tell anybody unless we talk about in every every week we talk about the nitty-gritty. What are you struggling with what you do this we card you sent word you fall short.

And you know as these men taken seriously like it's not often that someone trips up, but it happens so you accountability orders more my discipleship group arguing look at it yet starts out with, and we talk about each others weeks in a week we do a little relational stuff talking to each other, catching up and then we ask the hard questions you know I'm unit each and every single one of us know what the other person struggles with enthusiasm in which fault did you fall short earned nearly all excited. She set each other up for failure would say how is your week right when I with trusting that there antibiotics and opening us and then checking out because we do update each other throughout the week if temptation comes up.

We check in on each other and say hey and we talked about this early in the week.

How did that go and then after accountability and you asked hard questions and dive deep you then that's when I open up and start discipling the men on whether it's being a man of Christ or you other small little tidbits of wisdom that I can I pick up on her center lessons I learned in a like lecture yes.

As you know beer know that something simple, but it's not something that will occupy the practice right or finances or even some I struggle with from time to time and in college students don't necessarily get time to practice it because he knew most of us are don't have an income. But we do will do lessons on finance how to save your money, how to spend your money you put those. At least it's not specific advice on how to maybe invest in stocks or save your money, but like principles that they can be looking out for when they do get in and you know sometimes it is behaved like with them as valuable thing that you have to give somebody the solicitous somebody talk about with him soon. I asked him they was the most valuable thing you have to give somebody an independent answer. You'll talk about it, but I would say through time because when you give somebody your time. You can never get back right and how do you apply that in your life. It has a change. How does that knowledge change who you are and how do you that's good so I hear. This can be a just outcome and unplanned question, but you know you're spending time with these guys but it sounds like you're more in the leadership role discussed in more is there than there appear or their at the same level and it seems like are you being asked the same questions are they feeding back into you the way you're feeding them is typically an accountability group there, but it's kind of on the same plateaus not really in most accountability groups because that weighed everybody's is helping each other at the same level but I hear you referencing quite a bit about what how you feed them and coaching them.

You have to like you. You get that same benefit from them that you given to them in a way, yes, I certainly find myself to be the leader in the provider.

I guess of guidance and wisdom. Not to say that the other men are lacking in that area, but that's just my role as far as into the leadership part but certainly there. They do they are asking me are questions you know they are checking in on me. Yeah, they're keeping me honest. I guess that's what you're asking so I do.

I do have I do have the benefit of the accountability members during accountability and that I step into the leadership and guidance role after accountability you ever that's what I was looking for and and and also making sure you're getting fed right that you're not always been the one feeding that you're getting fitted for mothers and and maybe that's not in this particular relationship goes back to maybe some of the Paul's, the exactly you are not in a group setting. So you had the benefit of and around older men.

Click on the men's retreats that we do the mountaintop experiences numerous of all ages right and so it's been really refreshing to have an and rewarding for all of the men have you guys there. How do you see those types of interactions impacting your life and and when when you brought your group up to the mountaintop with us last year and so forth.

I can't. I can't recall specifics is convalescing to have a bad memory, but certainly I try and apply everything that I learn to my life so I listen to everything that set on the mountaintop and I learn from it and I subconsciously could subconsciously apply to my life and try try and be better because of it.

I think that's been instrumental here.

Certainly the guys enjoy here getting wisdom and understanding that other men older than the and then there's like to build the relationship so I have not to ask questions for them like us now are things just it's good to have you got that one more session to come up just the few moments for the supper break and will be right back with some TA WC MM would love to have you join their community of men for breakfast every first and third Friday of every month and Bible discussions and fellowship after the best breakfast in town meeting location is at their voracious poster First Christian Church and Connors will 1130 N. Main St. encouraged him a hard start at 7 o'clock from a hard stop at 8 o'clock.

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You're invited to a special two-day event TA WC MM presents the summit conference. The conference so big we need today for it all day. One kicks off at 6:30 PM with a special coed event at the First Christian Church in Kernersville, then you'll get to hear a message from speakers Lee Strobel Jerry Boykin and Bishop Larry Jackson. Day two is a man's one-day conference from 9 AM to 4 PM they'll have a multitude of speakers like Lee Strobel, Jerry Boykin, Bishop Larry Jackson Pat Teague and Bishop Charles flowers for tickets or more information, visit TA WC MM.com don't miss your chance to meet us at the summit on February 4, 2022 program were very special time with Joshua. My youngest son talking about life in college investing another young man just walking this this journey of life as a young man, following Christ suggests. Again, thank you for being with us. One of the things I want to ask you is the because young man is your talk will do talk about the deep wounds that they've got in their life is that some of the conversations you have parted when they grew up in.

Maybe the fathers were absent or were there in the wounds that the DS get that transparent with each other. Yes account, tear point, I could talk about earlier and I asked you to was the one thing you never told anybody in your life. That's the stuff we talk about so you are truly a there's 100% transparency about what happens in people's lives.

You know, and I think a lot of our men were fortunate enough to at least have both parents in the household. To some extent, but it we talked about some of those things be out like I can't. It's what we do is very rare yeah and in the people around us don't always understand it now. You have even had the opportunity to hear try and help help some at least help a woman start up in a female counterpart to what we do and you basically laid out how I how I started off with my Mengistu chicanery. She said hey I want to do what you do but I want to do it. You know, with my limit.

So basically you told her as a hey I got started off by telling the guys that I didn't things I never told anybody now is 100% honest and open with them before I even given the chance to share with me. So how to be vulnerable first or did you tell what happened to mom's iPod. I figured that when I myself but yes I am. I gave her the basically lay that out for so I felt like I was a ghost she could.

Maybe she gets it in a but anyways I but we we did that and you know we had a conversation, maybe six months later and we had an issue between one of my men and what her women and yet came up that my man, one of my my my man does have some difficulties had to own up to it to the accountability group right because it's not like I said it's not it's not biased it's it's it's honesty what's right is right was wrong is wrong so my man had an issue with the a woman that that she knew. And you know we were talking about it because it's Vegas rules.

You know what happens there stays there. You know but everybody has a right to share their part of it, you know, so if you share like you can't tell somebody hey you can't share your experiences with people right so so long as it belongs to them.

It's their thoughts. I guess right you just to be clear, the confidentiality piece resides in what's discussed in the group stays in the group unless it's something that's happened to you that you want to chill someone else precisely other people don't talk about those things that have happened or discussed in the group precisely so you know it.

It came out to be that you know one of my men had an issue and we were talking with him about it right as we were discussing it and has as the men and women and you know and he was like yeah I told my people about it in there like what you talk about that stuff in it there and it was like we talk about everything like that's we had time and they didn't understand like that I got was that was foreign to them. Ask what you mean like what you mean. We talk about the stuff. Was it what you guys talk about when you do your cousin.

This is like six months after they had started the group. Yeah, this is a set is the same person that you had asked me how to start their own room and I have a basically Astros like okay like what you guys talk about submit all of that stuff like the girls on open up about that because they don't trust each other was like it.

I was kinda sad because right yeah I thought here I thought we had a female counterpart to what we do, but even they, as she said in the. The women at group don't necessarily trust each other to share things like that they feel it will be judged and they feel like gossip will get around to share something for people to find out about so here I was thinking that this other groups practicing what we were doing and even now, it's like people don't people just don't understand. I don't get what is it, if it's like human to human nature worries that other people will fund the skeleton draw in the closet and this is part of this lack of transparency is as a whole. Jocelyn society people.

That's why there's all these façades as well as all the zeppelins social media to make you look different than you really look. You know the trim down face to trim down your body increase owners you bought investors reality. People don't want the real person to be visible and especially to other people that they don't know that will interfere in the small group and you can't get that transparent was the purpose of the small group with a piece of that we found in the past and working so many years with men is that the if the confidentiality ever gets broke then then you can lose a person for a lifetime. But just in that moment or that group which could lose them for a lifetime in it and it takes a while to get the trust developed on the knob is not uncommon for some groups to go six months a year. Even a year and 1/2 before the trust each other. You guys are very fortunate in that you started that of the gates. That way, and been very transparent in the everybody's held that close to the vest and practice that and that's one of things to jostle you know you and I talked about this two years is that men have to understand that protect stress that right on the front side of the meetings right even repeated throughout the meetings is since time passes.

Remind folks I what's said here stays here unless that person is given you permission to talk about outside the group.

So that's a good point here is a group of young ladies have started but having got to that point a level to trust each other enough to do that, you know, the NRC has been very blessed to be able to do it so early and so quick and the relationship with your group yeah you think him before starting grip.

My prayer is that God will prep the hearts of the men that were supposed to be there for you. And when I opened up with them because I was very stern and very clear. I said hey my expectation that she got to share everything to be 100% honest and I gave the member pressure game a little bit of leniency is like if it's not tonight. It needs to be in the coming weeks because rent closes off and and were gonna hit the ground running in order to be about organ to be about credit. I wanted to you. If you have a niche business and in the business world is sets the business that applies or sells a unique opportunity or product that can't be found elsewhere actually correct.

So I wanted to provide that spiritual niche to these men right. Anybody can go to Bible's anybody can go to to an on campus ministry, but I want to provide the opportunity and the benefits and a teaching that nobody else is offering to truly train the warriors is what you tell your your men that are ready to go out to really walk it out and not just not this talk about yeah I think that's that's yeah I've actually start to get more into the military analogies with warriors is exactly what they are to to your point and if you invited in by the military unit. People talk about special forces right to the special forces. If you don't know this is specifically the Army Green Berets in every special operations force has her turn there in specialty but Green Berets year will be called a force multiplier right because they they speak other languages right and they had each one of them has special skill set in their cross train ride and what what they do for the Isis military is a good other countries right in and raise up armies to fight on our behalf or to file and so what I have I considered to be the Green Berets of the Christian world. Each one of these men speaks of worldly language in a way you know whether be the sports whether be the music Weatherby videogames. They all know how to get into the culture right and relate to people right. Some Christians don't know how to relate to people who are Christian right right so these men speak the world language in a way that's productive for the kingdom, and then they have the specialty training. They have the heart and mind in the warrior mindset to to apply that to be force multipliers for the kingdom rights. That's why I taught I can soon be the Green Berets of the Christian world right because there they truly are force multipliers. At this point time each and every one of them is either mentor and somebody else or leading leadership in other organizations. That's good and how does a person go about joining this group. Social, so these are actually closed off groups and I've I started a second I start my Sunday night group because I want more men to be able to be a part of this. But as we talk about the confidentiality it's it's not it's not something which can bring strangers into and it's is something that has to be started from the ground up per group.

That's good. We just believe we certainly enjoyed having you these two shows it's been been really nice to talk to you to different level.

Yeah, we have some very good conversations with two of us and you know it Vista as a father. This one so you publicly very proud of you and work you doing for the kingdom and this excited to see were God's gonna take you through military career caps, the school and just just looking forward to seeing how you go into to demand the full grown man that God has planned for you to be in the know you will honor him in your honor your mother and your father and all that you do and that's always always a good thing in your mother and are extremely proud of you and thank you so much for joining us in the end, just a heart-to-heart conversation.

We folks is as you listen to this time just encourages it all have a conversation with your children, no matter what the age and just talk about the things that that are important to them. If I don't want that and how are they walking this thing out with Christ, if they are Christ followers in and just take an opportunity to build back into encourage a human and really just let them know how you you feel and how proud your ovum. I think we get so busy sometimes we forget to say that in none. Certainly, we demonstrated daily with their love and the things we do and provision those sort of things but it's good for their children here that once in a while, and especially just a special content. Doing that Joshua so as were close. No.

Just another multitude last thing I would ask is, what would you do differently in junior high and high school and here's a young man is a ours anything differently if you had to do oversight for said dating differently.

Certainly look back on this because my life's I can't said change done learn from food folks will remind you of got a great opportunity for you to come here Lee Strobel coming up here if it were fourth and fifth tickets are available on CHW CMM.com this talk.com would love for you to join us Friday night coed night for men and women all folks on Friday night and Saturday is men's only nod for this Friday evening that starts at 630. Cost is $30 per ticket. We can pass for $75 which would you be to five nights and one Saturday love for you to come join us have an absolutely wonderful rest of you. God bless. As we wrap up today show. Be assured that DAW CMM talking and walking Christian men's ministry is building a community of men are Christ followers with a desire to be servant leaders in their homes, communities, churches and work environments. Check out our website for upcoming events of regularly scheduled meetings opposite note for topics that you would like to have us visit in the future. Thank you for joining us on man talk today.

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