How Do We Relate To Each Other Part 1

Hey this is Mike Zwick from if not for God podcast our show stories of hopelessness turned and I hope your chosen Truth Network podcast is starting in just seconds. Enjoy it, share it, but most of all, thank you for listening and for choosing The Truth Podcast Network. This is the Truth Network welcome to mannitol and brought you by DAW. CM is talking and walking Christian men's ministry where there devoted to breaking down the walls of accommodation challenging them to take their God assigned as our host will Hardy and Roy Jones Junior a black eye and a white welcome and Roy, we have an exciting gift today, a man I miss Jane Lessard and Jane welcome to Manta. Could you just tell listening audience a little bit about yourself, your at Mary. What kind man on the yard all start and we had it. Taylor is our old.

They PA Anton Bell and Jordan is a financial advisor here in an we presently have to grant it that great. Let's also do not have been working.

I get a little bit of my background 40 years doing individual and couple and marriage counseling. That's kinda what I do when I'm not with my family and that's what we are here to talk about today we are talking about the issues that man and women are facing couples and marriage and we just gonna let God just take control and go in the direction that we lead us so really you think you will. And as bit as transparent as I am have no problem sharing the Jane professionally and personally. So welcome some sitting across the mic and the table from her as one of her former former clients I guess would be the best way to put folks counseling is good for anybody, they may hear, and struggle in your lifetime.

If you struggle with your marriage if you struggle, your spiritual walk. You need to get lined up with the strong strong counselor that is a Christian and that's what we have in James sword so this won't give her kudos from bottom heart say thank you so much for what you meant in my life personally as well as with the man that I work with on a regular basis. Thank you Jane, thank you, Roy. So that was laid off, or will J well I will just about here. Just ask, what is the number one problem that you see with men, whether single or in marriage that they struggle with putting the number one thing that you see the most common denominator crossed all the men over the years using one Roy. Fear of vulnerability. While that statement. Vulnerability is a weakness and it's really what women are cooperating that Internet connection. Body has made it a bit but here is in the world they don't really feeling their strong unavailable men don't have a deep relationship not only with the hot but with other man we we we talked about the club bit is the need for it seems also know Christ had the 12 disciples soon become 11 but he had the 12 with him for three years and if he modeled it with the strong level fellowship and intimacy. That's the very thing we should so Jane how much of that you think relates back to childhood father wounds that they've either been hurt or they worked. It wasn't demonstrated to him how to be open like that, Roy.

I definitely think you're you're on something I think God father typically from the great generation down. They haven't ended the call and or and commit huggy and so man grew up thinking that not only from their father but also from TV set and say you have asked what they think a real man.

Yet in it all. Jane with with the vulnerability.

Going back to the question is that for all man across the board or do you see a difference in the vulnerability of say versus unsaved man. I think there are only that type they have that love the lightning check with and hard for Amanda surrender even to chronic it harder for a man and a woman.

Women wanted to rent the longest granddaughter spell you another that is women want back where it for a man think that render it harder, but when I see that in a man like with Roy here, a man totally surrendered to cry band there's nobody hug and their brother and being real and honest and vulnerable about their struggle and that would play out their marriage.

So so what would be that thing that would prevent them from surrendering to Christ's.

The one universal plan pride and that's real is in the cello things I do want to give up control of certain parts of their life or they don't want to live a different set of rules right to render it unite your life over the God of the universe. They did with the applicant actually denies exhilarating journey any of us could ever think of, but I'm right there.

All men and Jane and now you years of counseling. We over the last year of talk a lot about pornography and distractions and we are seeing more more every day and just from that.

We talked also about seems to be a growing number of women that are getting engaged with this are hooked up to a Í to it. Can you speak a little bit to that to what you see, not just the obvious damage, but the collateral damage that you seen through families and through the spouses of either side that this is costing and how difficult it is to work through that. But there is there is hope they actually just a flight from that you don't surrender yourself to your wife or your husband and UK literally bake matters into your anti-hands down and so the outcome of that is, whether you're a man or woman. It it takes you into isolation. You don't need another and there's not that surrender there's not that vulnerability. I'll take care of my need to take care yours and to get out the window and it is state want to thank greatest holy to destroy man women in marriage. I think I have two Jane in my years of counseling where men attempt to make substitutions for the things that their wife is not submitting to them on or in an and so they look for these things outside of the marriage, and I think that's it. As you stated, that's the deception that Satan wants to interject here is that if I'm not getting wet my physical needs need to be field here at home and I'm going to look elsewhere. Correct the great battle between man and women of woman want love and then and down a man who want to isn't as aware of how to get it because the father wounds and tidal norm, and though the woman that I won't let you have me in life. I know you love me and then a man think they go down the freaking Backlick Road and a man of ethnography and a woman will have an affair or marriage begin the stock right is one thing to the affair piece is minimal. Often think about being a physical interaction with physical therapist Jane speak to the butt to the need to feel loved and this could even go back to the wounds of the father for daughter is that if there's a void.

There in the husband is not filled with them immediately. Look outside the marriage for that fulfillment and create an emotional affair. Few wills it right. Jane, that's right that Barak and that actually much more threatening the merit physical affair physical affair can easily be broken but when a man or woman leave the marriage that deeper emotional connection and find it is harder to make the marriage work.

Again, well that's something that I've seen where where if a man or a woman look for physical or financial affection or satisfaction outside the marriage.

I one thing that I've seen is that those marriages typically do not last very long.

So when rat so when they get out of the marriage looking for a way of escape, and then they get into another relationship and may begin to find out that some of the same things that they may have been encountering with their marriage. Now they are encountering with this individual you know whom they have the affair with. Let's want to never have understood people leave somebody for someone else and anything will how I would. How would you trust the other person and in totality right before hard algebra trust each other as you both have left situations to join each other with your point will when stuff comes old and worn down pretty often doing the same thing folks will be right back. Just more of her break your Jane were so excited hug you. Great topic of starfish. Okay when you just won't guess of TA WC MM would love to have you join their community of men for breakfast every first and third Friday of every month and Bible discussions and fellowship after the best breakfast in town meeting location is another voracious poster First Christian Church in Kernersville, 1130 N. Main St. encouraged him a hard start at 7 o'clock on a hard stop at 8 o'clock. First time visitors eat for free. Join your hose will Hardy Roy Jones Junior, a black guy in a white guy affordable chiropractic in High Point. As you might tell from their name, affordable chiropractic, even for the cash. Patient Dr. Jeff Ricky has been caring for patients in High Point for 34 years, physical therapy, such as ultrasound and spinal decompression for distribution such as herniation conference of care for auto accident injury patients with no out-of-pocket expense. Remember, affordable chiropractic on the W. Lexington Ave. in High Point Hall 336 85, 1987.

Welcome to mental grade. They were so so glad to have you back with his bridge were taking a break there for just a moment, and I'm happy to be here to well you know will good points that support that I tell you will you know I love you will do you know I'm so glad you it thrills me with the at least this pandemic I get to see you every two weeks or so every week or so. That's a good thing in it. :-) Doesn't it doesn't get a red cluster here makes me jealous okay okay so Jane went by before break will talk about the whole emotional thing how dangerous that is, if a spouse develops an emotional relationship or affair with another person that that's even harder to overcome a breakthrough because it had the deep level. Connection so and we were talk about that. The trust factor, then even if and I guess folks if you listen to the program in the middle of the situation, or you think about the middle of the situation. Be mindful of what you hear from this professional and this this lady the Lord knows after four years of seeing it, and the success is much lower recovery if you done something like that than it is anyway she shouldn't do anything really to be required should be doing anything outside your bowels. But listen, listen. Do not allow yourself to go down this path.

Don't allow Satan to take you off this this journey onto this particular path because he is the king of distractions. I man so Jane what what is the percentage of men that you counsel and just individual men that you counsel.

That's followers of Christ versus those who are not attracted. Really here of believers and unbelievers at probably percent of the labor percent are unemployed, and delete do you see in those percentages. Do you see differences with respect to the problems that they bring you question born-again versus non-great question and unite on way. Well, I can't say that I did, I'd say they're pretty similar to the one thing that I say Christian man bring to counseling is what is it mean to be spiritual leader, there's a lot of Asian around that for Christian man not knowing what it looks… A Dollar Doing What You Do. Praise God That That's an Alarming Responses. Think about It, but There's Not Really Love the Difference between Secular and Those Request Forms with the Exception. What Is It Mean to Be a Spiritual Counsel. Well, You Know That the Think the Thing That I Have Seen in an Counseling Christian Men Versus Non-Christian Men That with the Non-Christian Men and End. Again, I Haven't Been Doing This As Long As Jane. But the Thing That I Have Seen Is That the Non-Christian Men You Have To Really Filtered through More Lies Than They That They Will Tell, in Reference to Their Situation When They're Coming for A While Because Because They Are the Most Resistant and It Goes Back to What Jane Talked about That Pride Thing Right so so Pride Is Keeping Them from Really Opening up and Telling the Truth. So It's like Now You Have To Soar like Dive down through the Weeds and Filter out Those Things That You Believe What They're Saying Is True Based on Additional Questions That You Ask. You Know Versus Not Having It and That's Not to Say However That Christian Men Don't Lie, They Do, but I Think That's the One Thing That I See so You're Saying the Christian Men Are More Likely to Be Deceptive to Tell You What the Situation Is Coming in and Then Have To Uncover It Than a Secular Person. My Your Neurotic Vice Versa. Okay, Here's an Secular Person Is More Likely to Mask Exact Situations. Jane, You Find That Be the Case As Well. I Did All That Her Positive Side of the Real Battle We We All Can Take the American Dream Comfort Accumulation Image Where It Christ Said Why John, It Is like That You Might Know the Only True God, like Added after and Says the Curse Is Really Because Believers Even Totally Die That We Are in a Battle and It Not about Being, Is Exactly like What Comes to Mind Is Dying to Self.

Taking up the Cross, Is That Nothing in Space Is Men If You If We Really Look at This and so Was Was Love Our Wives Unconditionally like Christ Loved the Church and He Gave Himself up for the Church. So If That's What Our Role Model Is As Relates to the Family Unit. Then Everything in Our Family Should Be More Important Than We Are As Men. Nancy and That That's like We Were Talking about Just the a Minute Earlier.

You Know You Almost As a Counselor, and Again This Is My Experience.

You Almost Have To Be like an Attorney, You Know You Haven't Have Follow-Up Questions to Two Eventually Sort of Sort of Homely and or or Target You Know What That Underlying Issue That the Individual Was Hiding You Know and Emily Don't Want You to Know.

They Just Want to Give You Enough but Not Really Shine the Light on Them. Because of This Element of What We Call Shame. So the Right. If Yeah You If so.

If They If They If They Reveal Something and It's like Wow Is He Going to Think How Can You Do This You Know and Secure with Straightfaced at Typing Right so I Have You Had That Experience. Also during the Late Late I Think Pride and Shame by Hiding Our Tree Fell. I Think Christ Calls That to Take Apart Break) Amount to the Light and Be Vulnerable and in Figure Right We Find Ourselves Trying to Dig through the Mat and Unite All the Way That We Hi Really What They're All about Bringing It into the Light with This Great Paralympics in Never Thought of It Because Class Was Vulnerable. The Whole Time the Three Years That We Check in Scripture. He Was Vulnerable Whole Time He Was Walking He Was Traveling He Was Mask or Else It Was Serving.

He Was Never Being Served Was Always Serving Others, and a Unit of Beauty about Christ in the Ministry That He Had Is That He, God, Let Him Do All That He Needed to Do before It Was Time for Him to Go to the Cross of the Soul It It's like That That Example, I Should Think Should Be a Beaming One in Particular to the Born-Again Believers Is That God Has Us Here for Specific Time and Each One of Us Have Different Journeys That We Are on but You Know We Think in Terms of I'm Here until My Time Is up, so I Need to Be Redeeming That Time As the Scripture Say Because the Days Are Evil and I'm Just Saying If If If Every Man Were to Model Himself after the Whole Thing of Being a Servant and Be Totally Vulnerable and Then and Then Also If That Men Would Take the Mindset That If I Let My Family down Is No Different Than It with the Separation Occurred on the Cross, When God Had Turned His Back on All the Sin If You Think of Love in That Context, the Question Had to Be Separated from the Father That Every Time You Doing Something against Her Family That Your Breaking That Connection That Communion Together That You Nothing Great That You Will and That's What That's What We Do We We Do Break Fellowship with God. Yes, When We Sin and and That Fellowship Is Once Again Restored. Once We Repent of That Thing That We Are Guilty of and and Come Back and Restore Fellowship and Now We Become Reconnected Back to God. So Now We Can Start Listening to His Voice Clearly and You Know Begin to Carry out His Plan Right Our Lives and I Think Doing Would Say That Most People Recognize That Night, but They Don't. And I Would Guess a Forward Doing Would That Won't Share with Us. Here's the Men and Women Both Get Used To Each Other so They Don't Think of That Break with Debbie for Statement Dated Don't Think That Very Favorable so and How to Which You Will Get Another Moment or Two for This Session. Here Jane, but What What Would Be the One Thing You Would Want to Say to Every Man It's Listening Today.

If You Were Given a Couple Things Are Couple Things of Advice to to Help Them in a Preventive Measure in Their Life and to Be the Most Proactive Spiritual Leader of the Homes. What Would You Say to Him I Would Say That Christ Called Me This Magnanimous Battle Said That You Can Lead Your Family Here Wife and Your Children into an Intimate Relationship with Christ and That That Time Not Really for United Is the Coastline below Bringing in Thousands of Dollars over And Even Greatness. All of Being a Great Golfer or Whatever Whatever You Can't.

It It Back Back Initially Loving and in This Way, Your Wife, Your Kid Friends and Pointing Them. That's Really Good. Well Folks, If You Enjoy This Show Join Skin That Sweet Things Can Be Left with Is for Another Round Lesson This Time. Sure, and We Just Want to Remind You That God Loved His Son to Die, and All You Gotta Do Is Recognizing God for Your Sins, Asking Me to Hard and Start Following Christ of You Will Promise You It Does Give You Eternal Salvation for the Students and Remember Folks Were Not Guaranteed Tomorrow and Tomorrow May Never Come.

Jane Is Been a Pleasure Having You Will Look for the Heavy Dark Was Actually Will. I Just Want to Say God Is Good and Satan Is Alive, so We Joined the Whereabouts of These Is a Red As We Wrap up Today Show. Be Assured That TA W CMM Talking Walking Christian Men's Ministry Is Building a Community of Men Christ Followers with a Desire to Be Servant Leaders in Their Homes, Communities, Churches and Work Environments. Check out Our Website for Upcoming Events of Regularly Scheduled Meetings Drop Is a Note for Topics That You Would like to Have Us Visit in the Future.

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