When the String Snaps | Part 2

Was the wisest thing to remember when stress invades the home. This into Adrian Rogers ill will, we have strived so many times it is not because we have problems. Everybody is every family has brought what you say families that there were problems the right way.

Learn to attack the problem and not one to sit down and walk in wisdom to understand the other person try to see it from their viewpoint, empathize, sympathize, understand, welcome to not finding featuring profound truth.

Simply stated in Rogers when husbands and wives play the parts God is with them to play in their marriage is not humility but wonderful harmony part one of today's message. We learned that one of the greatest obstacles to the music of marriage is tension in the home. Too much stress is dangerous to your home, your health and your happiness. Proverbs 15 reveals four things to relieve stress in our families. If you have your Bible turn there now as Adrian Rogers reveals what to do when the string snaps today I want to talk to you on this subject when the strain synapse. I'm talking about attention in the whole pelican will beginning in verse 13 American heart make a cheerful countenance, but by sorrow of the heart the spirit is broken heart of him that hath understanding sake of knowledge, but the mouth of fools feeding on foolishness. All the days of the afflicted or evil.

But he that is of a merry heart has a continual feast. Better is little with the fear of the Lord than great treasure and trouble there with better is a dinner of herbs were love is been a stalled that is filet mignon and hatred bear with a wrathful man stirs up strife, but he that is slow to anger Pisa strife waive the slothful man is as an hedge of thorns, but the way of the righteous is made plain wise son makes a glad father but a foolish man despise with his mother's folly is joy to him that is destitute of wisdom, but a man of understanding walk up rightly without counsel purposes are disappointed, but in the multitude of counselors they are established by me to stop reading there, but I want you to notice some words just if you don't mind marking your Bible verse 13 sorrow verse 15 afflicted. Verse 16.

Trouble verse 17 hatred verse 18 strife.

Verse 22 disappointed in all of these are almost synonyms for strife, just strife. Our attention our stress. I suppose all of these are times when the fiddle string gets to type now. I think one of the major obstacles to the music of marriage is tension in the home.

It is stress and strife. Stress is related to raising your voice. It is related to raising your polls and raising your children if you godchildren you have stress just built in and look at these words. Again, sorrow, affliction, trouble, hatred, strife, all of these are stress were and being in today's home dear friend I won't tell you the string can get mighty tight and sometimes it can snap.

Not all stress is bad. I mean, it takes certain tension to make a violent plate all you got to have some stress but I'm telling you, dear friend that too much stress is dangerous to the home it's dangerous to the health and obviously then it's dangerous to our happiness solidly before things for things now just to relieve stress in your own adjuster. The music of marriage back there when the strain gets so tight when the upright get so uptight that the string snaps that he was so stressed up that you don't want to do that is your all stressed up and nowhere to go. I want you to pay attention because were going to go to the word of God and this passage from the book of Proverbs that deals with stress. As for very wonderful wonderful wonderful admonitions for your home my home your heart. My heart while you be surprised at this. Learn to laugh just learn to laugh like if you will, in verse 13, a married make a cheerful countenance there people laid claim to be saved, but they look like they have a gallbladder attack. I mean, if they have a merry heart. The Bible says is going to show up on the face, a merry heart maketh a cheerful countenance, but by sorrow of the heart the spirit is broken.

Now what is says the spirit is broken. What he means is the string snaps the spirit that's the wellspring of life that is the true inner man. And when that spirit is broken but is asked been used as him the spark.

The thrill of the fight is gone out of life but got a wholesome laughter is a gift from God, and Abraham Lincoln said one time that God must've meant for us to laugh or else he would not of made so many new and parents and monkeys and human beings. God wants us to laugh not only learn to laugh but number two.

Cultivate contentment, cultivate contentment, like if you will now beginning in verse 16. The Bible says better is little with the fear of the Lord than great treasure and trouble there with better is a dinner of herbs, where love is been a stalled ox and hatred bear with is talking about what the Lord is telling us that so many of us are uptight because our value system is wrong will always think we have to have more and more and more and we think that the house the gourmet food toys. The travel, these things are going to bring happiness. But many times the striving for these things is what brings tension into the hole by limiting the two scenes herewith pictured in the Bible and see if I can update them a little bit. First of all, here's a small apartment and the husband comes home from work.

The mama has been fixing me and so they sit down around the kitchen table. Now there's no linen tablecloth on their their plastic placemats and up the dishes don't necessarily match medevac. Some of them are chip is no silver it's a stainless steel and semaphore to been just a little bit. The paper napkins there on the table. The furniture is chip a little bit and the children come and sit around the table and that mom is been cooking and having denied a vegetable plate. Just what the Bible calls it a dinner. Here's a slow couple sitting there and the dad reaches out and they take hands together and he thanks God for their home. He thanks God for their love and he blesses the Lord says a man and then he talks about Susie's grades at school and so Susie, you did real good. They talk about old Fido the dog a little bit and talk about what dad did and somebody cracks a joke and they all laugh, and they just all are having a wonderful wonderful time praising the Lord and enjoying one just a little part is another saying the Bible gives here's a great big mansion. Big big columns out in front expensive automobiles parked out in front inside his plush carpet. You almost turn your ankle walking on it and you go in there and those polished entryway and those hand rub wooden walls and write beautiful paintings there than hanging up and there's a big long table and on the table. First of all this you know the hors d'oeuvres and then there's the appetizer and is all of the China in the crystal and silverware all laid out there over here is a woman with a face like a hatchet cold over here is the man sitting over here and he's haggard from his work in here are surly children sitting around the table, they won't stop to ask a blessing and in comes the smoking roast and incomes the asparagus and incomes, the iced tea with the man tenant and so forth and all of these delicately prepared things and after a while, the servant comes in and brings an exotic dessert and after dinner coffee with the cutting remarks and sarcasm. Maybe if they guess there's a politeness that some measured politeness which home to rugby friend. I would tend times 10 more rather be in that little apartment. I mean that with all of my high that big home without love can be a class after that meal I say where's the Pepto-Bismol where the Tums I am not saying that you can't be rich and have love some of the sweetest homes I know of have all those things and love, including if you got it. I'm so grateful for you. It's a gift of God and enjoy it. God gives us richly all things to enjoy.

I'm not against you having nice things but I'm just saying different. You better get your value straight you better find out what really matters. Listen better is well with the fear of the Lord than great treasure and trouble there with her is a bicycle plate where love is and filet mignon. That's what this verse is saying here in verse 17 gets your value system straightened out you being aware of the tyranny of things. Listen to first Timothy chapter 6 verse six, but godliness with contentment is great gain. For we brought nothing into this world and it is certain that we can carry nothing out and having food and clothes lettuce there with the content but they that will be rich and say they that are rich, but those who have set their mind on being rich. Have you ever done that. Mr. you are in great danger. They whose determination is to be rich fall into temptation and a snare, and into many foolish and hurtful lust which drown men in destruction and perdition. All the love of money is the root of all evil enough to say money is the root of all evil is volume of money, which is the root of all evil ever now and then some graduation commencement speaker will tell boys and girls now just make all the money you can just so you make it honestly I that's the worst device I've ever if you try to make all the money you can, then you will be making money when you want to be doing something you will be making money. We all be praying or going to church or be with the children. Maybe in the park try to teachable out like I lesson nobody should have a goal to make all the money he can show he has to provide for his family.

But when you determined that you're going to be rich. At that moment you put yourself in a very vulnerable position. Listen, cultivate contentment, cultivate contentment, the love of money is the root of all evil that literally means all kinds of evil which while some coveted after they've aired from the faith and pierced themselves through with many sorrows. But look back in chapter 15. If you will.

Proverbs and look in verse six in the house of the righteous is much treasure but in the revenues of the wicked is trouble, like if you will, in chapter 15 verse 27 he that is greedy of game problem with his own house. Soon I get married. Let your pastor give you some advice.

It's far better to marry a man is worth a million that don't have a sense that a married man has a million, not worth a cent you find out what the character that man is see if he loves God. Listen godliness with contentment is great gain. Having food and clothing be content. That doesn't mean that you can't try formal doesn't mean that God didn't want you to prosper. The Bible says God takes pleasure in the prosperity of the servants but you learn to be content with whatever you have and praise God and if you know, I can tell you before long the spring is going to snap and that big house won't mean anything to you not a thing I was right. Number three.

First of all, learn to laugh. Number two. Cultivate contentment.

Number three.

Alleviate pain alleviate anger like if you will.

Here in verse 18 a rascal man stirs up strife, but he that is slow to anger, you see that_he that is slow to anger Pisa strife in another word for strife is stress and learn different just alleviate anger. Now all anger is not bad. Jesus was angry but he was angry the right things.

The Bible says in Ephesians chapter 4 in verse 26 be angry and Sam not put all my dear friend. The Bible says here to be slow to anger. Proverbs 1417 says he that is soon angry dealers foolishly Proverbs 1813 says he that answer the matter before he hears it. It's a folly maching to him. Proverbs 29 verse 20 says she is now a man that is hasty in his words, there is more hope for a fool than of him. Be slow to anger and listen the way to control your anger is to control your words look again if you will, in chapter 15 verse one. A soft answer turns away wrath. The only thing I have to watch I have to watch what I say because what I say one word just bills.

The next word and that bills the knights were to gets worse and worse. Learn to control your speech.

The Bible says be slow to anger you.

So I can't control it passed. I just can't control your lyre, you can control. You know you get in the home of husbands and wives are just snarling and fighting and snapping about one another stroke. No voices or full of hostility and them right in the middle of that kind of a argument. The phone rang you go thousand hello so sweet and nice you can control and friend, you better learn to control it because if you don't control what you're going to get out of control. I mean just your very sweet.

Learn to alleviate anger and watch what you say I heard a man pushing a baby carriage and he said easy Harold easy Harold that's a boy how you doing fine. Her and somebody said it's just so wonderful the way you are so patient with little Harold only said no no he's Albert I'm Harold easy Harold learn to control that speech now if you would have a home full of music, learn to laugh, cultivate contentment, alleviate anger and last of all wall in wisdom look you will in verses 21 and 22 folly is joy to him that is destitute of wisdom, but a man of understanding walk up rightly without counsel purposes are disappointed, but in the multitude of counselors they are established now.

If you bring the wisdom of God in their home. Stress in the home is just simply a sign that you have forsaken the wisdom of God. God is not the author of confusion. God gives wisdom. Now, in order for the family to have wisdom. The family has to come together in a family council notice in verse 22 in the multitude of counselors.

This wisdom is established, you need is a family to come together.

You know I'm at age now I'm looking to see if I had to do over again, what would I do I can tell you one thing I definitely believe I would do would have more family councils that we have family worship, but I would bring the family together.

I would bring my children together and I would let them understand what is happening in our family to a greater degree what we would sit down and I would hear them and we would as a family say that everything that we have belongs to us equally. We have the amenities and we have responsibilities. Equally and we would learn to make decisions together. We would make a family budget, everyone would have an allowance and we would stick to. We would make decisions as a family about discipline, about all of these things together now course.

Dad has to be the leader of the band, but my dear friend, if you would take the strife out of your home learn as the father or if yours is a single parent family. You are the head bring those children to gather and sit down together and talk it out, you know what we have strife. The reason we have strife so many times is not because we have problems. Everybody has problems. Every family has brought what you see families that deal with problems the right way. Learn to attack the problem and not one another, sit down and walk in wisdom.

Try to understand the other person try to see it from their viewpoint from your child's viewpoint. Try to sit where the child sits see through the child's eyes empathize, sympathize, understand, sometimes a little paperboy was a better psychologist than a husband. Sometimes a husband to come home.

His wife will snap at him and growl at snarl and he just picks up some verbal club and gets her back little paperboy gets a new house on his route and the dog comes out and snapping and growling and snarling. That boy knows he has to deliver that paper every morning even more make an enemy of that dog. So what he does. He doesn't pick up a stick and throated that don't know if you smart paperboy you just kind of try to make a friend.

That dog and kinda just walk over and get us hand on his head just a little bit in rubbing and scratching behind the ear little bit just patting a little bit that everyday and after a while it all come out wagging his tail.

That dog that know the paperboy he's threatened by the paperboy little bit and what the dog really wants is affection. Mr. when you come home and your wife is snapping and growling. What she's really saying is show me some affection. Show me some love. Say maybe things are going terrible for her. Maybe she's threatening she's fearful try to understand what is bothering her. Like the paperboy tries to understand and all and try to understand yourself when you come home in a bad mood and ripoff of the wife is really her that you're upset with poison the ball so that guy that hated you off at the Expressway sit down at the family Council and talk it out.

Just talk it out attack the problem, not one another and when you when you come to these places where there's a multitude of counsel and is a difference of opinion as much as possible, give everybody in the family a chance to save face. You can disagree without being disagreeable, but do it all in the spirit of unconditional togetherness. I think I've told you before that I told Joyce if you ever leave me. I'm going with you. I mean to gather we do friend when all else fails, just read the instructions learn to laugh, cultivate contentment, alleviate pain in wisdom. And if you don't the string is going to snap and the musics over father, thank you for your word so precious Lord I pray that you put the music back in our marriages and the melody back in our homes. The rhythm back in our walk in Jesus name, amen men and maybe today as you listing your home is not all that it needs to be there is stress there were some other fracture.

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This message is also part of the insightful series. The music of marriage for that complete collection.

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You can also purchase our new Bible studies, much like this message in our online store to find dad go to LWF.org/radio. Is there tension in your home that's causing your family stress and strife for the string snaps learn to laugh, cultivate contentment, alleviate anger and walk in wisdom. So glad you joined us for today studying God's word. Be sure to tune in next time. For more than Roger's right unless, where, is an encouraging message we received recently from a listener ran across one of past Roger's sermons on YouTube for five years ago during the worst time of my life. The work that the Lord did through that man changed my life. I must admit I cannot find anyone else that can bring the word like Pastor Rogers, thank you for sharing that detail of your own life, and how God used a message from Pastor Rogers to help you get through a difficult time. We are honored to share resources that inspire growth and perseverance in your faith in every season that you might be going through when you donate to love worth finding right now when I think you by sending a copy of our new book the music of marriage's insightful new resource will help couples find or get back to the loving song we were meant to play in marriage, request a copy of that book, the music of marriage when you call 1877 love God