Children, Obey Your Parents

Now we come to the next section. The role of children are college children, obey your parents.

We visited this text a few times over these almost 4 decades. I've been with you because of you going to preach on children. There's not a whole lot of text, pick from, and this is one of the primary ones so it's going to not be a whole lot of brand-new stuff here, but things you need to hear things you teenagers need to hear and reaffirm in your hearts and you moms and dads who are beginning your journey of raising children, you need to hear this again and reaffirm these things in your own hearts and those of us who are grandparents need to reaffirm these truths in our own hearts so Paul now says that here's the way you live as spirit born children of God.

And when it comes to being younger people who are under your parents.

Here's what you're supposed to do. Chapter 6 Ephesians verses one through three children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right. Honor your father and mother, which is the first commandment with the promise, so that it may be well with you and that you may live long on the earth now I let's get right to it.

Notice this is an emphatic command. This means emphatic that is just strong and it's clear there's no digital opinion around the bush here. It's a straightforward, strong, clear to the point children obey your parents you you wonder why that's such a needful instructor to needful instructor because children are very prone not to obey their parents, and this dishonors the Lord now there so many children today in the world.

You and I live in the culture that you and I had to live in that are so anti-truth in the way they behave them and I could explain it that way there anti-biblical their anti-God until the spirit permeates our children and all the culture that we are to be anti-authority were to be against all authority, that's absolutely contrary to the edict of God.

God ordains the authorities in the earth, and for children there told by authority and so many children today have a dishonorable and disrespectful attitude when it comes to their parents and to those in authority over them.

John MacArthur, in his commentary on the section. The Scriptures stated that the United States has at least 8 million serious assaults each year recorded by children against their parents. 8 million such disrespect and disdain for their parents.

He continues and he says this. Children who are incessantly told that they can do whatever they wish and hike the end that they can have their own way. Our children who will soon mock their parents, their teachers, moral standards, the law and society in general.

All human relationships obviously grow out of those of children with parents, children who respect and obey their parents will build a society that is ordered, harmonious and productive that we look at the Scriptures we think about this thing of honoring authority.

Let's remind ourselves that all of us are under authority and I don't bleed too much over in the parenting because that's the next installment. Ephesians will talk about merchant parenting but Tom parents parent parents train their children as those who are under authority. We need to make sure our children understand that that we are not doing what we want to do in the way we raise your answering to the authority over all God's word, our Lord, God is over us and when Debbie goes to work. He has an authority he has to submit to these honor obey his employer, etc. etc. moms are to honor and obey their husbands.

All of us have authorities we must submit to its God's way of ordering society and what Paul is exercising her nice Christians you want to be beginning to grasp the wisdom of this patient be just a common drudgery to you. You should be able to see that God's great wisdom is behind the structures of authority. So here particular children, obey your parents now into chapter 1 Jude mentions some very violent corrupt types of me and in wickedness and he he he he elaborates and said get in the same way these men also by dreaming defiled the flesh, it means they're involved in file wicked things with their flesh. Then he says and reject authority is in that interest to Heath. He loves the rejection of God ordained authority right in the midst of the most vile wicked sins and second Peter chapter 2 verses nine and 10. The same kind of thing the Lord knows how to rescue the godly from temptation and keep the unrighteous under punishment for the day of judgment, and especially those who indulge in the flesh. Notice this wording in its corrupt desires and despise authority. There it is again these people. He says that there they're involved in violent wicked things and they despise authority. They do not want to honor the authority God's put over them and is that not just prominent in our culture today. Just all kind that don't be surprise that a culture that begins to cite every sexual are vile lust a man has were not supposed applauded in a ferment and encourage it and less rebel against all authority is just debauchery almost and the we have this notion. Good night. I think this release became springing forth in the 60s.

That's a long time ago now what is this notion that a person is not to be held responsible or not to be told no to anyone we all should be to do as we feel as will we even have children today who are claiming their transgendered and their parents are actually getting them hormone therapy think it was Vanderbilt University and I believe was Princeton University who have done studies on the children and said that the great majority of them are fine. Later on in life there comfortable with who they are and that is borderline child abuse. If not, child abuse to do this to show divorce.

This notion, the notion comes from my answer to nobody but me.

I am my own final authority I mean in today's world we come up with all the sophisticated high sounding narratives. For a while we can reject God ordained authority. Matter fact in most cases. Thus, I will that's abusive. If you have to submit to someone will that's abusive. If you require to obey another man or person well that's abusive for exactly some of the feminist would tell us that teaching the wife to submit to her husband.

Well that's abusive. Some union leaders might say that telling an employee needs to honor and obey and work for his employer not working under the Lord that civil that's abusive, a liberal church member liberal professing Christian might say that while being taught to obey your elders and submitting the church elders will that's abusive and on and on and on we could go up the psychologist and the psychiatrist. So many of them would tell you, you really can't tell a child know anymore you can rinse and expect a child to disobey anymore. That's warping their self-development.

I just read recently about a type of parenting. I think they call it peaceful parenting or some so beautiful, peaceful parenting, and when your child gets enraged and throws their milk glass across the room and knocks their food in the floor, your peers would like your to sit down and reason with.

I continue something better to do, they should be taught to obey the look that makes pretty good sense.

If you reject the Bible's teaching of the sin nature. But when you know we all have a sin nature to all children coming to the world obsessed with themselves wanting their own way and not caring how they put others at a disadvantage they ought to be called and talked to obey. So today we have the spirit. This resisting of authority it's championed it's applauded it's celebrated and by the way, even more so it's become the spirit is permeating the evangelical church today. I told you before, and to shock to the things I'm beginning to hear about this mindset in the church. It's like Proverbs 1215 says the way of the fool is right in his own eyes, but a wise menacing who listens to counsel. Well, the Bible says foolishness is bound up in the heart of a child so he comes into this world thinking he knows what's wise in his own eyes. He knows mom and dad are wise. He's wise in his own eyes.

Now there's a time for sure.

When a child has to be listen to me made to obey again. Don't get too far over to the parenting message that's next, but because we should try to reason that and explain things. Some you dads. Might be a little too harsh or too far in some you moms might be able to our firm. There is a place to give child some understanding but look, you gotta be discerning.

There's a lot of times when charges has to be made to obey, but then as a child gets older. In those teen years and certainly the upper teen years. We are praying and working that our children obey. Ask because there beginning to discern the wisdom in obeying their parents and praise God. When we begin to see that taking place in their hearts. What a blessing that is but not a small child, a toddler and own up in those years, most of the time they just had to be made to obey. Judges 2125 speaks of the spirit that is becoming so prominent in OUR culture today. In these days there will be no king in Israel, no authority, that is an everyone did what was right in his own's will that I speak our culture about the work that was the culture that Paul was writing to a pagan culture had no reverence for the God of Scripture.

So you just had people doing whatever was right in their own eyes and by the way the children in this culture were widely abused and treated horribly in some cases, especially if they were born to the wrong phentermine infanticide which is common in the ancient Roman Empire. If you had a child. The parents just decide one to keep this one, or expose it. And that's the way that you children.

So when you get away from the Bible when you throw out the Bible is the foundation for your country and for your ethics and for your loss. I'm telling you, you are on the road to ruin. And so when Paul writes to the church is writing to Christians he's writing to those of the gospel is change their heart there beginning to grasp God's truths are right is only saying to them. You folks be the model of doing it right in your home starting with this emphatic instruction.

Children should be obeying their parents the spirit of disobedience to God ordained authority comes from Satan because he is the arch rebel of the universe when the employer or the government of the church are parents establish good rules are good laws or standards and and will and we hold those under us to those standards and we expect obedience we are not being abusive were being biblical and even we are being loving. One of the best illustrations I've ever heard about why child needs rules and they did to be disciplined when they break the rule is because children need the loving security of knowing there are guardrails in life that if you raise a child without rules, you raise a child without discipline then you're like sending a child over over only a bridge with no guard rails is just very insecure. They don't feel protected and they don't feel loved and is he that is and I believe some of these liberal folks. I believe their genuine and sincere. They think they're really loving their children by abandoning the concept of respecting and honoring their faith anchor loving their children by throwing out discipline, but actually the children are growing up saying we don't know where the barriers are. We don't know where the, the guardrails of life are in it brings an insecurity. It was years ago when believers my oldest daughter was in the maybe the sophomore year in high school and she had a friend and friend ask about her doing something and she asked me to her mom and we said no you can't do that. It was funny the reaction that we heard from this girl. She said to come to my Katie Lee. She said you know my parents never tell me know. That's her first response. It was lucky believe. Your mom and I want you to that. Her first response was, in effect, I wish someone would tell me know and I think you see that in the heart. Another kick against it. All my goodness the world that the universe is going to melt if they don't get their way there, cry and scrape and by the way for child gets in the floor and holds their breath and just beats on both just let him direct there in the floor. I guarantee they'll gas for the moment will start breathing again everything's going to be fun. Look, do you understand they have a little demonic sin nature and you got to break that will you've got to teach your child to respect and honor authority. But don't be surprised if you are a real permissive parent and you about thrown out discipline. If your children grow up to not honor God either these things go together. It's the foundation stone actually in culture, but those who resist those who undermine those who disobey God ordained authority.

They're not godly they're not wise, and they certainly should not be followed because what they are as foolish rebels. The rebelling against a few on rhythm of their not rebelling against the human individual listen when you rebel against one God's put it authority over to you.

You rebel against God. They wanted me to. My parents are imperfect in the matter.

The kings imperfect the word honor the king. The Scripture teaches moms and dads are imperfect, but you honor them for the Lord's sake and trust God is big enough that he can work through imperfect parents and give you your perfect outcome in life and he certainly can do that.

We do know the Bible makes it very clear that the proud rebel will be punished. The Bible says in Proverbs 1605 everyone who is proud and heart is an abomination to the Lord and assuredly he will not go on punished so teenagers cannot challenge you tonight. How is your attitude toward mom and dad, not the Bible to do more than just begrudgingly go along with that the Bible want you to see that God's ordained this for your good and his glory. Children obey your parents at this emphatic command is actually an evil spirit to resist authority and that spirit again has permeated our world today. It's an filter infiltrated our nation. It infiltrates the workplace it's infiltrated the home and unfortunately it's infiltrated the professing church brothers and sisters, let us be resolved to honor the precepts of God and honor the wisdom of God. Let the rebel scarf.

Let the God projectors rage, let the seductive and deceptive one, spread their lies in the undermining. Let the liberal and the man centered humanists laughed mock and ridicule us as as primitive are barbaric, whatever they may say but listen God's truth stands let God be found true in every man a liar and that's what Paul is saying when you come to Christ you reclaim these grand old standards of God. The foundation C. This is very emphatic. Children obey your parents, children, and all the sentries of our past, should obey their parents. Children of today's world should obey their parents and children of the future world should obey their parents. It's emphatic. There's never a time when this is not right we will not evolve as a people beyond the necessity of children but your prayer it's it's it's it's for all time. Matter-of-fact nature's law teaches that we see that it ended in nature of those who give life the parents are expected that their offspring would honor them and follow them and obey them.

Well it's emphatic secondly, a big word it's axiomatic or self-evident.

The words is just obvious that this is right and that's the way Paul writes it here in it in Ephesians chapter 6 verse one children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right God our creator designed it to work this way and to function this way. It's just right. Nothing more really needs to be said. Romans 920. The Bible says. On the contrary, contrary. Who are you old man who answers back to God will thing molded not say to them will not save the motor.

Why did you make me like this will it is poorness. God made us in this is the way he designed us to function in our families. It's it's axiomatic it's it's self-evident. This is the right thing. It's woven into the very nature of our being. It's woven in the very nature of creation itself that children should obey their parents so nature shows us the truth of it. The written law on both the Old Testament and New Testament affirms the truth of this.

This is exactly as it should be. It is right, just like all the commandments of God are right and we must lovingly and courageously teach what God's word teaches and expect ourselves and expect our children to honor God's word. Why because it's right is right and always will be right. Psalm 19 verse eight the precepts of the Lord are right, rejoicing the heart the commandments of the Lord is pure and enlightening the eyes. Someone 1975. I know, old Lord, that your judgments are right. Psalm 119, 128 therefore I steam all your precepts concerning everything for.

I hate every false way.

Hosea 14.

Nine whoever is wise, let him understand these things, whoever is discerning. Let him know them for the ways of the Lord are right, it's axiomatic. It's always been right now when we teach our children to obey and when children obey this discipline and oversight of our children must be guided by love never abolished by love. That is such a twisted spin on what love is certainly love God's how we discipline you must not discipline your children in anger I'm get over in the next to it. Next installments message have been over and apparently so loved us God. This principle of juvenile bank but love never abolishes what you know. I just can't correct them. I just can't spank them because you know I just love them so much know you don't you love yourself. Because when you say your wisdom is better than God's wisdom that self idolatry that self-love over honoring God and living God in his strength. The understand that mom and love will do what's right in God's eyes against your emotion. All my goodness, how how we need to just let this sink in our thinking in this warped world in which we live in today. Proverbs 1324 reminds us he who withholds his rod hates his son, but he who loves him disciplines him diligently to hear that. If you hate your child will not require them to obey you will not discipline when they disobey, but if you love them, you not withhold the rod of correction so it's right and it is good for the child. It's good for the family. It's good for the culture in the nation which those those families exist for children to be made to to honor their parents but me even more than the good outcome. What Paul is saying when he says children obey your parents for this is right. He saying it come from the God who can only give you what writing good do it for the silly little Christmas song for goodness sake be good for goodness sake the sake of the God who gave it and it's it's it's inherently the right thing to do. Melanie give you a challenge and thinking about that and that is to be glory of God focused understand that we don't just follow the rules. We don't deify the rules we deify, we glorify rather the God of the rules we we trust his wisdom is greater than our wisdom. Now, the world. The devil in your flesh will always come up with the exception clauses of why a young person should not obey their parents and and rebellious young people always come up with great sounding reasons why they can exempt themselves from obeying parental authority and that this is why you have a rebels always ganging up with each other because rebellion loves company. You know why because their conscience bothers them God's put that in their heart that there to honor their mother and father got screwed in the heart 30 obey their parents if they're in rebellion in doing things they know their parents are saying that they should not be doing. They got to appease that. So they get other rebels to run with them and that strengthens our rather diminishes the power of their conscience, and it encourages more rebellion. I've been in many churches.

By the way and and and the that there were young people and groups in those churches that they had didn't have tattoos and didn't have weird colored hair and didn't have piercings all of their bodies, but they were a gang of rebels.

They didn't have the heart to honor God and have a heart honor the parents put on the Christian can cloak and still have a heart that is in rebellion against God. A home that does not teach obedience to parents is a home of sin and it's a home of shame. It's a perversion of God's standard and the God ordained patterns why because it's axiomatic. It's self-evident. This is right now third concept here. Not only is it emphatic is just clear and precise. Children obey your parents. It's axiomatic is just absolutely self-evident that this is the right thing. It comes from God, but it has a prominent student, even compared to other commands of God.

In verse two, he says honor your father and mother, which is the first commandment with a promise. Honor your father mother know this is an IN our text, which means it's a quote of the Old Testament.

It's a quote of the 10th commandment from Exodus chapter 20 metric God gave Israel for commands about their relation to him and then when he started about how you conduct yourselves one toward another. The first command he gave was honor your father and mother and Paul is pointing out that this command.

It has a prominent student. I think it's because it's so foundational to everything else in life. It's so foundational to how a child grows up and relates to their employer one day and how they relate to the the of the elders in their community, how they relate to their spouse rated how they're going to relate to their God when they know later. It's foundational to everything in the society and everything to their life.

So God gives it a real prominent.

It was one of the 10 Commandments it was engraved on a tablet the stone by the very finger of God.

So we see a prominence to this commandment. The Jews always listed this verse when they would teach their young people because it act. It is so necessary of a foundation to bless succeeding generations. There was a Chinese proverb and it says this one generation plants trees in the next gets the shade well when we are training our children ride and teaching them to obey and disciplining them when they disobey were planting trees or bring the blessings of shade later on down the road not only for ourselves but for many, many others. Now when he says were to honor them. This expands things and it shows.

Again, the prominence of this because honor comes from the heart a young child doesn't have a heart of wish to be at the bowels of the young child's heart has foolishness and it as a child grows up there under sound teaching and work were for filling their hearts and lives with the gospel to the things of Christ in the spirit can enable them to grasp the wisdom of God and they will begin to learn not only just to coldly obey mom and dad, but again, to obey them from the heart with honor towards them that so very important not just cold obedience. The heart of honor and respect for mom and dad.

So children must be taught and encouraged to cultivate a heart of reverence, honor and esteem for their parent and we have to remind ourselves this is not natural that this isn't that a bartering system where we get our children to jump to the right hoops and do things we won't because we reward them certain ways know we want our children to grow to where they obey is not because they're going to get a reward because they learned the wisdom of it and there is an honor and respect in their hearts now let me just say a word of balance here and that is that there are times when a child must honor their parents but not obey their parents's. I have had the unfortunate ministry. At times, if you will of counseling with the person who was abused as a child and I mean clearly abused in some of the most vile way. Sometimes, and obviously a child that's being told by a parent to do what is evil and wrong cannot do that. Why because there is authority higher than mom and dad that we can keep an honorable spirit but disobey the command and I think that's very very important. I think that the the narrative of Daniel in Babylon is a great example and so glad this is talk to me early on because as Daniel wanted.

He was a Jewish teenager and he brought into captivity there in Babylon, and in the King begin pushing on Daniel who knows and that's a promiscuous and and and pagan culture. The kinds of evil. A teenager could've gotten into Brasa King would push on these Jewish exile Boise that Artie pick Daniel out as as being a very promising leader for him and his kingdom and they told then you gotta eat these foods and do these things in Daniel with the spirit of reverence for the authority the king said if I can have your permission. Let me keep my Jewish dietary laws to see if I can't serve you better by doing so Daniel can't maintain the spirit of respecting and honoring authority but purpose and to disobey any command that does the dishonored are violated the law of God and so there is a time when children should try to maintain an honorable spirit, but they could not and must not sin to submit to mom and dad and mom and dad. If we cross the line get over the next message. By the way, again, then we ought to go to our children and save dad's under authority to I answers. I'm not the final authority here, God is, and so dad was wrong here. My attitude was wrong. The way I approach this was wrong. When you forgive me. As children learn that your under authority in your submissive authority. It's amazing what God will do in their heart now.

Lastly, number four this is a a command that contains an encouraging promise. There's an encouraging promise. It's it's it's emphatic. It's clear and precise.

Children obey your parents. It's axiomatic. It just right. It's it's self-evident that you write.

It has a great prominence is the very first command.

God gives. I think that's because it's foundational to so many other things in life. Then lastly, there's a unique promise.

That's given here and noticing he has it in their verse three so that honor your parents so that verse three it may be well with you and you may live long in the earth now will remind you that within these are considered general principles, not absolute specific promises. Generally speaking, a child that honors his parents will do well and live longer. Generally speaking, a child that has a rebel spirit and dishonors his parents will not do well and will not live long over. There can be an exception, but that's the general rule, so this is a revelation of the general purpose of God. That is what some theologians call the usual course of Provident's. This is what usually will happen. Now there's a negative side to this.

If you ought her father and mother. First of all you're going to do better and you're likely to live a lot longer if you do not.

Proverbs 3017 comes in the that mocks the father and scorns a mother. The ravens of the Valley will pick it out in the young Eagles will eat it that mean that the ravens and the Eagles in each eyes, major debt there. The first when there's a dead animal out there in the far somewhere.

The first thing that happens is one of these birds come down and pick him to make sure it's artfully dead. That's what he saying the odds are good if you're not race with discipline and you are disobedient to parents that you're not going live long on this earth. It's a general promise this will serve to God's glory and our good if we honor and obey parents as young people.

I will sometimes I don't know maybe 1 to 3 times a year. I'll get a card or letter in the mail get a phone call and honestly I barely remember some of these people and they'll say something like brother Jeff. I was in your youth group 35 years ago and you taught us. Anil named the biblical truth that are our refer back to biblical truth, did you taught us that and I didn't believe it and I did honor that and I've been through such trouble in my life.

But now the Lord has saved me and I thank you for giving me that it now want to better track because over time, God's word bears itself out in your life, T.

M. The real really will expose these things now to practical thoughts number one remember this when you promote a child's rights you promote rebellion. Now there are some children's rights. I'm not saying that.

But if that's your theme in life you got this right you get this right you got a right to do this, you got right with it.

If that's the spirit of your home, in the spirit of the way you raise.

I'm telling you promote rebellion with you promote responsibility you got responsibility to honor God, you got a responsibility under God, to obey your parents you promote revival you promote rights you promote rebellion for promote responsibility you promote revival.

Generally speaking, that's true. And lastly, for young people. Put your heart and mind on the things your parents have done well on the one talking to some of you and I know over the Internet. Of the places I'm talking to. Probably many people and you might be 30 years old, you might be 70 years old and your parents failed you are a parent failed you and hurt you. I understand that I've been through some of that but it is a wonderful thing when God will give you the grace to say but you know they didn't do this right and my parents did do this right and focus on those things. I read the testimony of a young man and his father was a medical doctor and he said a couple things about my bed. First of all, he was never home because he was always working. He was always working and he said I grew bitter about that. And then when he was home. He was the kind of man that I couldn't talk to you just almost impossible to talk to and I grew even more bitter about that and he said then I learned later in life there some good things that my dad took such good care of us and I was able to go to a good college and he covered all the tuition and the bills and so he was faithful to take care of me and faithful take care of the family descended, I learned something I never knew about and that my day was very generous. He gave free medical care to so many people who couldn't afford it and he gave so much money to good causes and Christian ministries that supported the gospel is being preached around the world and he said I learned of these things through other people. As time went on a solution. I determined to focus on the things my dad didn't do right and that's what I challenge you today that's been great for me that would be great for you.

Stop focusing on the things your parents did wrong and start praising God for the things your parents did write there some stuff in there if you look for it and you know what God will give you the victory and then as a mom or dad and then as a grandmother or granddaddy are great-grandmother are great granddaddy, our great-great-grandmother, our great great granddaddy you can determine that you're going to do a better job in those areas, but always honor your forefathers, children obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right at lack of Christians what he say act like a Christian in your home's